what happens when you get hit with a line drive at dodger stadium

ever wonder what happens when you get really good seats on the baseline at dodger stadium and you get pegged with a line drive right off gonzo's bat?

i will tell you.

ball comes flying at your face at 80mph. put up hand to stop ball. ball hits your hand so loud that everyone in the section gasps. ball bounces off your hand and kid in the row behind you gets the ball. gleeful kid is shown on dodgervision. hand begins to swell to the size of... well... a baseball.

no one comes to see if you are okay. you start to feel nauseated and dizzy. 20 people in your section flag down an usher. usher brings bag of ice. emts show up. you stand up so they can look at you and you slump forward and nearly lose consciousness from the pain. very nice man catches you before you go face first into the crowd.

emts strap you to a gurney because you can't stand. the rush you to the first aid room in dodger stadium. there are 3 other people there, all of them had passed out as well, but not because they had a line drive crushed at their face, just because.

bunch of people come to tell you there's nothing they can do. hand is now twice the size of the other. nurse comments that you are green. meanwhile the padres score 6 runs and pardes fan in bed next to you is cheering despite having passed out 15 minutes earlier. try to flip off padres fan until you realize hand is likely broken.

doctor gives you injection of painkiller and wraps your hand. swelling is out of control. sit in first aid for another hour until urge to vomit subsides.

return to seat. the crowd applauds. have flashbacks at every foul ball hit to the right side. consider sitting under seat.

dodgers lose. leave ballpark with busted hand and no foul ball.

go to local er for x-rays. wait over an hour. no one comes to see why you're there or do any triage. get disgusted and have friend take you home since you can't drive.

write one handed post for laist. go scrounge for vicodin. try not cry.