Toto, I don't think we're in Arizona anymore
I asked for a "souvenir helmet sundae." This is because I wanted 1) a souvenir helmet and 2) a sundae. Well, I got number 2 as this is clearly a sundae. And I got half of number 1 as this is a helmet. But how in the world is it a souvenir if it is not the helmet of the team whose STADIUM YOU ARE SITTING IN WATCHING A BALLGAME? I already have about 500 little plastic Dodger hats. Why in the name of Vin Scully would you give me another one when I am at Chase Field, home of the DIAMONDBACKS? I want an ARIZONA souvenir helmet. I didn't drive 400 miles and endure 114 degree heat to pretend I'm at Dodger Stadium.
Why do they even have Dodger helmets there? Did some desperate DBacks ice cream employee hijack the helmet truck on the way to LA? Did they not order little helmets in the new Sedona red so they were forced to use anything they could find? Does this make sense to anyone at all? Anyone? Bueller?