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Food

Simply Wrong Food: Jack in the Box's Cheesy Macaroni Bites

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Having PMS and being drunk have a lot in common. You get horny and/or aggressive, and end up alienating everyone around you. And then there's the food. Nothing makes you want fatty, fried, carb-laden, crazy drunk food like PMS. Jack in the Box was definitely counting on this demographic when they came out with "Cheesy Macaroni Bites".

Fried macaroni and cheese is nothing new. They have been serving it at Cafe 50s for awhile now, and Fred 62 has their infamous Mac Daddy and Cheese Balls. The fast food version vaguely resembles chicken nuggets. The generic recipe for all of their "snacks" seems to be: take food, form into a geometric shape and deep-fry it. Surprisingly, "Cheesy Macaroni Bites" aren't horrible. For people raised on Kraft Mac and Cheese it's actually kind of like comfort food. They are not obviously greasy at first, and definitely retain their mac and cheesiness. After only two Bites, however, the fat spins sweep over you and you can hear your arteries slamming shut.

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A 6-piece order of these belly busters contains 444.2 calories, 9.6 grams of saturated fat and 1221.2 mg of sodium. You know you're going to hate yourself in the morning; just limit yourself to the order of 3 or you will hate yourself right now.

Photos courtesy of Fast Food Critic. Used with permission. Check out the Critic's review here.

Update: I wish I were dead. I should have just driven off a cliff instead of the drive-thru.