Sorry, Cronuts: 3 Reasons We're So Over Junk Food Mash-Ups
Alright gimmicky junk food mash-ups, the game is up. Like cupcakes and food trucks, it's time to call it quits. This more is more mentality has got to stop.
Since the dawn of the cronut craze we've seen an onslaught of food hybrids: ramen burgers, donut hot dogs, Pepsi Cheetos, spaghetti burgers, and the rebirth of the Cheeto macaron. There's even been a mashup of a mashup, as seen with the Shake Shack cronut concrete and San Francisco's cheeseburger ramen soup. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, food mash-up, but you're getting diluted into a goopy, soupy, cheesy mess. Here's why we're happy for this trend's fifteen minutes to be up.
It's lazy. Perhaps it's not the cronut, but the Doritos Locos taco that's to blame. Whoever the instigator was, I'm not happy. The list of these demented centaurs of the food world goes on and on ad nauseum. (Seriously, just thinking about eating these things makes me nauseous.) As tired as the farm-to-table claims are, I'd take those over this any day.
It's not healthy. There's something to be said for simplicity. Especially when it comes to health. We've worked so hard to tackle childhood obesity in this country. What kind of example are these culinary monstrosities setting? Before her fall from grace, Paula Deen served up bacon burgers on a Krispy Kreme donut and banana splits on a brownie pizza—and only later found out it came with a side of diabetes.
It's unholy. It just seems tasteless. We've all sat next to someone who mixes up everything on their plate into one blob of slop. It's just gross and annoying. Even things that would seemingly go well together, shouldn't. Take coffee and OJ. Great morning pick-me-ups on their own. Together? Disgusting. That's not to say all mash-ups are bad though. We're a huge fan of the international fusion action -- like Kogi, Matsuhisa, Momofuku and Good Girl Dinette -- when it's done tastefully. Just don't make it a played-out, grease-fueled train wreck. Show some respect.