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Overheard in L.A.: Why We're Sleeping With Our Exes

This week's edition of Overheard in L.A. features bits of overheard conversation from Trader Joe's, the valet line and the juicery.
Overheard of the Week
Twenty-something woman: "You know how a few weekends ago it was incredibly hot out? Well I slept with an ex because I wanted to use a pool... So LA of me and totally worth it."
In Franklin Village via @Sarah_Oestreich
Drunken Confessions
Man to Robert Pattinson: "Hey Robert, i just wanted to say that I'm a big fan of yours. I didn't read any if the books like some faggot but you're really good, big fan."
At Roosevelt's valet at 2:45 am via @Sarah_Oestreich
Drunk Cliff Notes
Random drunk woman to her companions: "What is the great Gatsby?"
(a few seconds later)
Random drunk woman: "Siri, what is the great Gatsby?"
At Hamburger Hamlet via Caroline An Stockstill
Adorbs
"I love his little meth face."
via @erinjennings
Chronic Condition
Woman: None for me, I'm allergic to alcohol.
Server: You're allergic to alcohol?
Woman: Yeah, I might break out in handcuffs.
via @ClassicPhill
Okay No One In L.A. Is Sober
"I've got to take it reaaaaal easy today...I'm on prettay STRONG VICODIN."
via @Potasnik
Social Media Tragedy
"I did not post my throwback Thursday picture. Oh fuck."
via @JennHoffman
Throwback Thursday
Drunken neighbor: "Livejournal is still around? I put a picture of my belly piercing on Livejournal and I was grounded for two fucking months."
In West Hollywood via Sharon Knolle
Line In The Sand
"I don't think I can date someone who likes Maroon 5."
In Echo Park via @wrappedinRED
Labels
"He's not gay, he does yoga."
via @chelseakarst
Rich People Blahbetty-Blah
"This is the first Longchamp bag I bought in Antigua. Usually I get them in St. Martin."
At the movies via @ElDresser
Rich People Blahbetty-Blah 2
"Well, the blue lamp was only $1200."
On Melrose via @rhombergerer
Culinary Catastrophe
On McDonald's Egg White McMuffin: "It's like wearing someone else's underwear. It just doesn't feel right."
via @losangelista
Be Afraid
"Bitch, I will life-coach the shit out of you! I'm really good."
via @GregWalloch
Mmmmm...Diamonds
Hipster 1: "I hate people who don't buy fair trade coffee."
Hipster 2: "It's like drinking blood diamonds."
At Trader Joe's via @deSouza_palooza
Priorities
"I just want to get home so I can watch Arrested Development."
During a Southwest Airlines cattle call via @TVTherapy
Real Housewives, Indeed
"Larry bought her a BMW so she loves him again."
In Brentwood via @LarryJohnMcN
Aspiring Real Housewives
"I can tell all the women at this bar are trying to find a husband.. They're all wearing silk halter tops from Banana Republic."
via @bexmarie
Days Of Our Lives
"OMG, look how many people liked my Instagram? This is the best day ever!"
At Street Food Cinema via @AshleyLauren809
Rebellion
"I'm gonna get a tattoo. But I'm doing it in Hebrew, so maybe my mom won't be as mad."
via @susanorlean
You Mean, Pacifically? (Groan)
"Hey man, what body of water is this?"
At Venice Beach via @rachegoblue
Don't Believe The Hype
"You could put truffle on cat shit and it would still taste amazing."
via @mollishka
Eye Roll
"I stopped drinking rum when I moved back from Barbados..."
Overheard at the Juice Stand downtown via LAist comments
Some People Have All The Fun
"My therapist told my parents I didn't have to get a job. This summer is going to be awesome!"
Outside Amoeba via Kamille Dixon
Our Overheard in L.A. feature relies on you to send us the strange conversations you overhear in this city. Send them our way at tips@laist.com. (In the e-mail, put "overheard" in the subject and tell us who said it, where they said it and any amusing context.)
Previously:
Overheard in L.A.: Partly Sunny With A Chance Of Plastic Surgery
Overheard in L.A.: How We're Spotting The City's Jerks
Overheard in L.A.: Our Coachella Fantasies
Overheard in L.A.: Things That Remind Us Of The 405
Overheard in L.A.: How We're Passing Our Drug Test
Overheard in L.A.: Starf*ckers At Sundance
Overheard in L.A.: Why Being Beautiful Is So Important
Overheard in L.A.: How We're Gonna Get Famous
Overheard in L.A.: How Our Dreams Were Crushed
Overheard in L.A.: Places You Might Hear "YOLO"
Overheard in L.A.: Shit People Say At Auditions
Overheard in L.A.: Our Rule For Dating Porn Stars
And more!