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What, Jack Nicholson Was Busy?

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In another example of a Chicagoan coming to LA to change something sacred comes the story of Carl Amari who is putting together a box set of cds that will contain the dramatic reading of The Bible by Hollywood actors. For some reason they can't figure out who to play Satan.

The first part of the project, a 20-CD set of the New Testament for $49.95, will arrive in stores in October. Considering the proven potency of both the audio-book marketplace and Christian retail, it might be a holiday-gift sensation. The presence of Caviezel should give it instant cachet in many Christian circles; the 100-person cast also includes Terence Stamp as God, Michael York as the narrator, Luke Perry as Judas and Marisa Tomei as Mary Magdalene. The recording sessions began in July, but, to the consternation of Amari and director JoBe Cerny, the role of Satan is still up in the air. "We're still experimenting," Cerny said Tuesday from the studio in Chicago. "We have some ideas and someone in mind, but nothing is for sure yet. It's a challenge because it needs to sound really devious and seductive and, uh, you know, devilish. But you don't want to be too over-the-top."

York, who noted that Americans seem to cast Brits as both deities and devils in movies ("I think it has to do with diction"), said he was surprised to hear that the fiery role was still available. He also offered a wry casting suggestion for the ultimate evil. "How about that fellow from 'American Idol,' Simon Cowell? He's seems up for the job."- LA Times

May we also recommend: Dick Cheney, Ryan Seacrest, Ann Coulter, Marilyn Manson, Lemmy, Gwar, Henry Rollins, Rush Limbaugh, Don Imus, and of course Sanjaya.But seriously, if they broke this down into the separate books of the Bible for a few bucks via iTunes, we might be interested.

After the jump see who else will be playing whom...

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According to here are some of the other castmembers:

* Academy Award winner Richard Dreyfuss ("Mr. Holland's Opus," "The Goodbye Girl") - Moses * Academy Award and Golden Globe winner Lou Gossett, Jr. ("An Officer and a Gentleman," "Roots") - John

* Chris McDonald ("Happy Gilmore," "Quiz Show") - Luke

* Ernie Hudson ("Miss Congeniality," "Ghostbusters") - Peter

* Golden Globe winner Stacy Keach ("Prison Break," "Hemingway") - Paul

* Golden Globe and Tony Award nominee, Lou Diamond Phillips ("La Bamba," "Young Guns") - Mark

* John Heard ("Prison Break," "Home Alone") - Matthew

* John Schneider ("Smallville," "Dukes of Hazzard") - James

* Kimberly Williams-Paisley ("According to Jim," "Father of the Bride") - Mary, Mother of Jesus

"Empire Falls" by Clinton Steeds