USC-UCLA Liveblog Extravaganza!!!!!

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Matt Sanchez and Kevin Craft hope to lead their team to victory. AP File Photo of Matt Sanchez/Mark J. Terrill; AP File Photo of Kevin Craft/Jeff Lewis

Final

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While this was a dominating win by USC, it was a bit underwhelming. Perhaps the fact that the last score was with 12:31 left in the third quarter had something to do with it.

But the Trojans are off to face the Penn State Nittany Lions on New Years Day in the Rose Bowl while the Bruins lick their wounds.

And I am off to get food. I'm done.

Fourth Quarter

0:00 And the game is over. Finally.

1:30 What the hell is going on with Sanchez's throat? It looks like it was a huge pimple that was popped.

2:10 Until now. Hehehe.

2:15 "Another easy pick"? Craft hasn't thrown an interception at all this game.

2:49 460 yards - 128 yards. And USC is only leading by 21 points. That just doesn't make sense to me.

3:18 Will Ferrell makes me want to commit mass murder. I never understood what his appeal is.

3:29 It looks like USC won't cover the spread. Woo hoo!

4:12 Now they're talking about Sanchez as a Heisman candidate for next year! Uy vey.

6:11 That picture of Sam Bradford makes him look like he has an extra chromosome. But he has my vote for the Heisman.

6:51 Watching that Gatorade commercial makes me miss Keith Jackson as an announcer. Whoa Nellie!

7:01 I really hope the Bruins find themselves a good quarterback. It would be nice to see a competitive USC-UCLA game.

8:00 What the hell? A play was run during the commercial break? Good job ABC.

8:27 The SEC Championship is done. Florida will be going to the BCS Championship game. And best of all they covered the 10-point spread.

9:27 Big props to Steve Sarkisian for running the ball as much as possible. The sooner this game is over, the sooner I get to grab something to eat.

11:40 As this game goes on I realize I usually tune out the announcers. I only caught part of their split championship scenario discussion.

14:03 Now is the time for the Trojans to make a statement. If Oklahoma happens to lose tonight, the voters will look at this game to see whether to jump the Trojans to the #2 spot. So far in this game it's not going to happen.

Third Quarter

0:00 Stat so far: UCLA has been held under 100 yards of total offense after three quarters of play. The fact they are not losing by more than three touchdowns is more due to the fact USC has not been running on all cylinders and missing opportunities.

0:24 That was very gutsy having Craft make that long throw on first down.

0:30 David Buehler missed his third straight field goal. While it may not cost them in this game, that is something to look at for the Rose Bowl.

0:39 Watching Mark Sanchez run the bootleg reminds me a lot of watching the Denver Broncos offense when they had Jake Plummer as QB.

0:45 Steve Sloan dropped a sure interception. It came right to him!

1:15 USC is slowly grinding the game down. It feels like they've been on offense for the last hour.

1:36 I can't wait to watch that Bucs-Panthers game Monday night.

3:48 The mid-third quarter doldrums. The worst part of a football game.

8:16 I think that's Craft's first completion on a first down all game. I could be wrong though.

8:22 MMmmmm Yucas!

9:29 Mustain hands off to Gable for a five-yard loss. Whoo Pig-Sooey!

9:36 And we have a Mitch Mustain sighting!

10:25 That Panormous Pizza looks yummy.

10:25 Just a note to Kevin Craft. If there are more than two cardinal jerseys by your receiver, don't throw to that receiver.

11:41 That was the best run by Kahlil Bell all game. Does that mean UCLA's offensive line is doing their job?

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12:31 A Ty Pennington special? Is it going to be a variety show? Or will it be footage of him getting fisted while on a sling?

12:31 The Trojan's quick strike offense produces yet another touchdown.

12:51 That's an awful penalty called on the UCLA defense. That was not a helmet-to-helmet hit on Mark Sanchez.

15:00 Why the hell are they jumping around? That is gayer than my left nut. Stoo-pid.

Halftime

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This game has been more hard hitting than I anticipated. While USC's defense is still stout, they did give up two penalties that led to UCLA first downs. But USC's offense is having trouble adjusting to UCLA's defense.

After making a point at stopping the run, UCLA defensive coordinator Dewayne Walker did a good job of adjusting to stopping the pass towards the end of the second quarter. The few times UCLA blitzed they did manage to make USC quarterback Mark Sanchez very uncomfortable.

If UCLA has any chance to win this game, Walker really needs to dial up the blitzes. On the offensive side, might I suggest the A-11 offense? At this point it would hurt any.

Second Quarter

0:09 USC missed another field goal. Wide left. With two missed field goals the Trojans missed a chance to cover the first half spread. Craft will take a knee.

0:19 The Bruins blitzed five to the quarterback and got an incompletion. Dewayne Walker needs to call up the blitzes more often.

1:07 A minute left in the game and the Trojans need to score another touchdown to cover the first-half spread.

1:55 Nice gratuitous tit shot of the USC song girls. It makes me wonder, are there song boys?

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1:55 Sanchez stays in the game and hands off to Stafon Johnson who runs into the endzone. Touchdown USC. No Mustain. No Megadeth.

1:59 Sanchez is hurt. Are we going to see Mitch Mustain? What about Dave Mustaine? Mmm. Megadeth.

3:05 Keanu's going to save the world again! Oh he's so dreamy!

3:05 Joe McKnight had the chance to take it to the end zone. UCLA got lucky on that one. UMPIRE DOWN!

3:11 Great job by Verner stripping the ball out of the hands of the receiver. UCLA needs to hold USC scoreless to feel halfway decent about their position going into halftime.

4:01 That was a great stop by UCLA's defense. And all of that undone by a roughing the kicker penalty. Rick Neuheisel's face says it all.

4:36 It looks like USC isn't as sharp as they were in the first quarter.

6:27 The two kids guarding the Victory Bell look puny. I think I can fuck them up. And why are they holding up the vagina sign?

7:53 Just took a couple shots of jager after realizing that I'm sober. Is drinking alone at home a bad sign? Whatever. I'm liveblogging so I'm communicating with some people right?

7:53 USC did a good job of holding UCLA to a three-and-out after the interception. But I don't think they will cover the 18-point spread for the first half.

9:49 Another hold by the Bruins. But that was a gorgeous interception by Norris. I'm still amazed by it.

9:54 Michael Norris intercepted Mark Sanchez but was called out-of-bounds therefore incomplete. It was reviewed and overturned. UCLA ball on their own 11-yard line.

11:37 A blocked punt. Oh my lord. It looks like it'll be a very very long game. *sigh* USC takes over at mid field.

12:34 Taylor Mays had that interception in his fingertips. Man Craft got away with another one.

13:01 If you're going to be that inept offensively, stupid holding penalties is not going to help your cause UCLA.

13:22 That's the second first down UCLA got thanks to USC penalties.

14:00 Is that another first down for UCLA? No. It's third down.

First Quarter

0:00 End of the first quarter. So far it looks like USC's offense has figured out what UCLA's defense is going and has responded going into the endzone twice on consecutive drives. Meanwhile UCLA's defense is going to have to get more pressure on Matt Sanchez if they have any shot of keeping the game close. I won't even talk about UCLA's offense. Aside from that trick play, it is horrible.

0:56 Look at this! A first down for UCLA! Is it their first first down?

0:58 Ah. The first words about Steve Sarkisian going to UW. And Craft was lucky that batted ball was incomplete. A lot of cardinal jerseys around that ball.

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1:09 Damien Williams goes in for another USC touchdown. The Trojans responded to the Bruins defense by throwing it on this drive. And the Bruins just look silly downfield.

2:36 Craft throws on second down to no one. The only player close to the ball was a player in Cardinal.

3:34 ABC just whipped out the nifty Google Earth animation on the distance between the Coliseum and Rose Bowl.

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3:34 Joe McKnight on the reverse lunged for the end zone. Touchdown USC.

3:44 UCLA's secondary is being tested and failing now.

4:13 USC is going for it on fourth-and-four on UCLA's 35 yard line. Sanchez converts it to tight end Anthony McCoy.

4:50 USC is getting nothing on the ground. Dewayne Walker is forcing USC to go through the air.

7:00 As conservative as UCLA's play calling has been so far (with the exception of the touchdown play), it's a good call. Get some yardage on first and second downs on the ground and hope Craft can make a short completion to get the first down. Let's see how it changes over the course of the game.

8:32 USC misses a 41-yard field goal. Wide right. Two drives from each team and the Bruins still lead 7-0. Wow.

9:00 Wow. UCLA's defense really came to play today. They are going after Sanchez and not letting any big plays happen.

9:16 Just an update. At the end of one quarter Alabama is leading Florida 10-7 in the SEC Championship Game in Atlanta.

10:56 How the hell did Mark Sanchez make that pass to Patrick Turner? He was blanketed by two Bruins defenders and Turner made the perfect adjustment to catch that underthrown pass. And a rough the passer penalty for 15 yards.

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11:07 Trickeration for the Bruins leads to a touchdown! UCLA draws first blood!

12:32 UCLA's first play after the fumble: a Kahlil Bell run for no gain. Really now Norm Chow?

12:39 CJ Gable runs on first down and loses the ball. FUMBLE! UCLA recovers on USC's 20. Oops. Play being reviewed. Was Gable's knee down? I don't think so. It's out.

12:45 Three-and-out for UCLA's offense. USC's defense just looks nasty. I don't see how UCLA is going to get a first down much less score on offense.

14:05 First two plays for UCLA on offense are two runs. I guess Neuheisel isn't feeling Craft yet.

14:55 UCLA gets the ball to the 27-yard line. The referee flags USC for improper gear and charges them with a time out. UCLA immediately takes a time out. Crowd goes wild.

15:00 Todd Blackledge is now waxing poetic about how pretty it is that both teams are wearing their home jerseys. It's pretty sad how that's a big talking point of the game.

15:00 - Beh. ABC's showing the postgame interviews with Virginia Tech, the winners of the ACC Championship Game. *yawn* I just listened to the pregame interview with Bruins head coach Rick Neuheisel on the radio. He was really generous in describing his team.

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Pregame Notes

This is my first attempt at liveblogging, so it will be a test to see how long my interest can be held until my mind starts meandering.

About the game I expect there to be a huge tidal wave of Bruin blood to rush down from Pasadena and cover everyone in the Basin. Looking at what Vegas has to say, the Trojans are between 31 to 33 point favorites depending where you place your bet. Hell at the Wynn the game is off the books!

Simply put if USC wins the game, they go to the Rose Bowl. If they lose, they get to go to the Holiday Bowl in El Paso. For UCLA win or lose they are not eligible for a bowl game, so it's all about pride for the Bruins.

I just have three wishes for the game: the game is interesting; the announcers won't be annoying twits and USC doesn't cover. Yes I did put $100 on UCLA yesterday taking 33 points.

Booze: check. Computer: check. Food: check. Clothes: um. Whatever. I'm in the comfort of my couch. Who needs clothes?

Enjoy the game!