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Play Nice or I Swear to God I am Going to Steal a Tank and Mow You Down One by One

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I hardly ever drive, and it amazes me that in the short time since I last traversed our city's freeways, lane merging is no longer standard practice. In fact, it is not even allowed. Our city's drivers have decided en masse to never let anyone merge. Ever again. Remember merging from driver's ed? Or at least traffic school? Right-of-way does not make you invincible. Right-of-way does not give you the right to kill me.

I get the thing about not letting other cars pass you. It is an insult to your pride. I understand that someone driving 60 in the fast lane is willing to speed up to 90 to make sure another car can't pass them so everyone knows how big their dick or Joan Jett clit is. But come on, there are situations where you are the world's biggest tool if you refuse to allow another car to merge:

- When someone is merging onto the freeway and you speed up, even when that car has nowhere else to go, other than driving off of the embankment or into a concrete wall.

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- When there is an upcoming freeway split, diamond lane, or popular exit, and another car is signaling and changing speed. Don't get territorial about your spot on the road. They are going to keep on going and get out of your way. They aren't asking for much. But no, they speed up, you speed up. They slow down, you slow down. Now they missed the exit and they have to drive to fucking Pasadena. Thanks.

- Lastly, for the people who don't give a "thank you" wave when I let them merge in front of me - you suck!

Photo by Andresmh via Flickr