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Living in Sin: Not A Sprint, A Marathon

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Jen Sincero is a musician, sexpert, and the author of the bestselling book, The Straight Girl’s Guide To Sleeping With Chicks and the semi-autobiographical novel, Don’t Sleep With Your Drummer. She currently hosts a weekly sex talk radio show called Dr. Happypants on

Living in Sin is her weekly advice column for LA's sexually curious, confused and constipated. Got a question for Jen? Ask her. We promise to be discreet (all questions will be posted anonymously).

Dear Jen,
I’m a 26 year old guy who feels like every time the race is just getting started, I’m already at the finish line. I was curious if you had any suggestions on how to get my girlfriend off quickly.

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It appears you have confused a hot, sensual experience with a track meet. Not only is the female O a notorious slowpoke, but your "let's get this over with already" attitude is a long way from sexy, and will no doubt make her lose her clitoral boner altogether.

I suggest you instead focus on slowing your roll. Work up to the big bang with plenty of foreplay. Make the fist ten minutes all about her. Put on a condom to cut down on the sensation until you can get things under control. Practice holding off your orgasm while you masturbate. Think about your grandma's feet while you're doing the deed.

If you work at it you can absolutely improve your stamina, and once you do, you'll be able to enjoy the journey instead of worrying about the end result, which will be way more enjoyable for both of you. Regardless of who finishes first.

Got a question for Jen? Ask her.

Previous Sins.