Extra, Extra: Commandment Breakers Wanted

"Morals" Photo by ~db~ via the LAist Featured Photos pool on Flickr

• Are you involved in a discreet affair through Ashley Madison, need $1,000, and willing to appear on the KTLA morning news with Ashley Madison's President, Noel Biderman? Yeah, LA Observed doesn't believe it either.
• In "they probably won't even notice it's gone" news - CHP officer, Joshua Wendall Blackburn, 33, of Murrieta was sentenced to five years and eight months in prison for breaking in and stealing more than 140 pounds of cocaine from an evidence room. He confessed the same day he stole it, pleaded guilty to the charges, and authorities recovered all of the cocaine, which had an estimated street value of $1 million.
• Not that we should have to warn you about DUI checkpoints, but heads up in Laguna! Also, if you see any suspect DUI-ers, don't hesitate to call 911 and tell on them - you may stop a bad situation from getting much worse. If you do get drunk at a Holiday party, call a cab, you'll thank yourself in the morning.
• There is an indirect correlation between your finance portfolio and your prescription drug intake.
• Wall Street's Bernard L. Madoff's (alleged) $50-billion Ponzi scheme is hitting some California heavy hitters HARD. Steven Spielberg, Jeffrey Katzenberg, David Geffen and many in the Jewish community are claiming investment losses. "In a word, it's a catastrophe -- by far the biggest Jewish story of the year," said Rob Eshman, editor in chief of the Los Angeles-based Jewish Journal.
• A woman died from injuries sustained from being hit by a freight train yesterday. A bystander tried to get her out of her car when it got stuck on the track, but his efforts weren't enough.
• I hope you're not using Internet Explorer right now. If you are, you are currently being hijacked!
• In Iraqi culture, throwing shoes at someone is a sign of deep contempt. The Iraqi journalist that threw the shoes at President Bush on Sunday shouting, "This is your farewell kiss, you dog!" (in Arabic), may face jail time.