Paula Abdul: American Drunkard?
Anyone who saw American Idol last night was probably scratching their head over Paula Abdul's bizarre failed anecdote about a moth finding a melon and/or a cornflake. What the hell was that all about? A quick Google search for "moth", "cornflake", and "melon" yielded a bunch of very odd hits, but no ancient bit of Chinese wisdom that would have dovetailed nicely into the show and made one of the leaving contestants understand the universe a bit better.
We suspect that Paula has been spiking her Coca-Cola with something a bit more harsh. Since she's a Valley Girl, the good money is on something like really different and colorful like Apple Pucker, Blue Curacao, or perhaps MC Skat Kat's liquor of choice, Hot Damn. Paula, "Straight Up" should refer to the advice you give the folks on the show, not your drinking style.