Congress has cut federal funding for public media — a $3.4 million loss for LAist. We count on readers like you to protect our nonprofit newsroom. Become a monthly member and sustain local journalism.
This is an archival story that predates current editorial management.
This archival content was written, edited, and published prior to LAist's acquisition by its current owner, Southern California Public Radio ("SCPR"). Content, such as language choice and subject matter, in archival articles therefore may not align with SCPR's current editorial standards. To learn more about those standards and why we make this distinction, please click here.
Movie Review: My Bloody Valentine 3-D
()
This is how we deal with shoplifters! | Photo courtesy of Lionsgate
My Bloody Valentine 3-D, directed by Patrick Lussier, may be a remake of the original 1981 horror classic of the same name, but this time around it's a fearless festival of blood, guts and gore, packed with enough explicit sexual content to taunt an NC-17 MPAA rating (though we'll have to settle for an R.) One of the film's most memorable scenes involves a completely nude Farrah Fawcett look-alike running across a sleazy motel parking lot, screaming for help as a pick-axe wielding, deranged miner chases her down and tries to cut out her heart. Sounds too hilariously horrific to be true, doesn't it? And did we emphasize this remake is in 3-D?
Like the original, the story centers around the tiny mining community of Harmony, whose inhabitants are struggling to rebound after a fatal mining accident occurred there ten years prior. The only survivor of the accident was head miner Harry Warden, who awoke from a coma one year later, just in time for Valentine's Day, and sought revenge on those around him using a pick axe as his trusted tool of torture. One of the targets of his revenge was Tom Hanniger (Jensen Ackles), a novice miner whose father once owned the town's mine shafts. Tom, however, escaped the wrath of Harry Warden and eventually Harmony's local law enforcement took matters into their own hands and put an end to Harry once and for all, or so we are lead to believe.
Support for LAist comes from
()
Run, bitch or you gonna die! | Photo courtesy of Lionsgate
Jump forward to present day where an older Tom Hannigan returns to the town of Harmony on the eve of his father's funeral. He's ready to sell the mining company and say good bye to the memories that have haunted him for the past ten years. Unfortunately for Tom, things don't come easily. It seems the pesky county sheriff, Axel Palmer (Kerr Smith), has married Tom's old high school sweetheart, Sarah (Jaime King), and a love triangle that was buried ages ago emerges once again in true soap-opera fashion. To complicate things, Tom's return is conveniently timed with the reappearance of madman Harry Warden and another killing rampage ensues.
In no time at all, Sheriff Palmer is on the case and enjoying the outpouring of evidence (two words: sex tape). Bloody death after bloody death leads him to conclude that Tom must be responsible for the latest spree, though we're not entirely certain that Sheriff Palmer is as straight-laced as he appears to be. The "who dunnit?" suspense builds and builds until the film's final minutes when we are privy to the killer's identity. While the story slowly snowballs into something beyond comprehension -- the deaths become more violent and the plot lines more ludicrous -- this is exactly what you'd expect to find in a solid slasher flick. The bonus addition of 3-D effects makes it all the more fun to enjoy and begs the question: will there be a sequel? We sure hope so!
As Editor-in-Chief of our newsroom, I’m extremely proud of the work our top-notch journalists are doing here at LAist. We’re doing more hard-hitting watchdog journalism than ever before — powerful reporting on the economy, elections, climate and the homelessness crisis that is making a difference in your lives. At the same time, it’s never been more difficult to maintain a paywall-free, independent news source that informs, inspires, and engages everyone.
Simply put, we cannot do this essential work without your help. Federal funding for public media has been clawed back by Congress and that means LAist has lost $3.4 million in federal funding over the next two years. So we’re asking for your help. LAist has been there for you and we’re asking you to be here for us.
We rely on donations from readers like you to stay independent, which keeps our nonprofit newsroom strong and accountable to you.
No matter where you stand on the political spectrum, press freedom is at the core of keeping our nation free and fair. And as the landscape of free press changes, LAist will remain a voice you know and trust, but the amount of reader support we receive will help determine how strong of a newsroom we are going forward to cover the important news from our community.
Please take action today to support your trusted source for local news with a donation that makes sense for your budget.
Thank you for your generous support and believing in independent news.
Chip in now to fund your local journalism
(
LAist
)
Trending on LAist
-
Censorship has long been controversial. But lately, the issue of who does and doesn’t have the right to restrict kids’ access to books has been heating up across the country in the so-called culture wars. -
With less to prove than LA, the city is becoming a center of impressive culinary creativity.
-
Nearly 470 sections of guardrailing were stolen in the last fiscal year in L.A. and Ventura counties.
-
Monarch butterflies are on a path to extinction, but there is a way to support them — and maybe see them in your own yard — by planting milkweed.
-
With California voters facing a decision on redistricting this November, Surf City is poised to join the brewing battle over Congressional voting districts.
-
The drug dealer, the last of five defendants to plead guilty to federal charges linked to the 'Friends' actor’s death, will face a maximum sentence of 65 years in prison.
Best of LAist