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Inmate Celebrates Salami-Free Seinfeld Festivus From Jail

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Claiming religious affiliation with fictional Seinfeld holiday "Festivus," 38-year-old inmate Malcolm Alarmo King, a convicted drug dealer, got a judge to grant him high-protein, kosher meals because he didn't want to eat salami.

"It's not uncommon for folks in custody to try to get something than what other people have, and this was a pretty good attempt to do that," said Cmdr. Dave Wilson of the Orange County Sheriff's Department reports ABC Local.

A pretty good attempt, indeed. While rumored to be based in real-life holiday trauma, Festivus is a purely sitcom occasion comprised of feats of strength, the airing of grievances and an aluminum pole. Even Ben & Jerry's made an ice cream in honor of the ridiculousness.

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King enjoyed his special meals for a couple of months at the Theo Lacy Jail facility in Orange until sheriff's food services staff realized the holiday sounded bogus. They eventually went to court to get the order thrown out. Merry Festivus for the rest of us.