A Credit to the Race: Caped Kosher Crusaders

On this, the first night of Hanukkah, a holiday that commemorates a successful Jewish revolt against an oppressive king, it seems fitting to honor Judaism's most valiant heroes. Forget all the great thinkers, activists, comedians and football players us Jews have spawned. I'm talking about the leotard-loving, cape-wearing crusaders of the Jewish Hero Corps, a slew of Semitic superheroes with an array of incredibly dorky and uniquely Jew-y super-powers.

-- Minyan Man turns into 10 men if needed
-- Menorah Man can grow as many as eight arms and shoot flames from each of them
-- Shabbas Queen uses something that looks like a Hitachi magic wand to disable mechanical objects on the Sabbath
-- Magen David has an impenetrable centuries-old shield that contains "an arsenal of creative weaponry" (Guilt? Self-deprecating humor?)
-- Yarmulke Youth, also known as the Kippah Kid, is a capped crusader with a belt full of trick yarmulkahs that can morph into anything from a radio to a parachute to a bulletproof shield

The Jewish Hero Corps is the brainchild of Alan Oirich, who created a series of interactive comic books designed to empower Jewish kids. I discovered the Jewish Hero Corps one fateful day at my local Middle Eastern market, when I was foraging in the back of some long-forgotten grocery store shelf and came upon two dusty, weather-beaten boxes of what turned out to be Jewish Hero Corps kosher macaroni and cheese. Never before and never since have I seen anything like this, which is probably a good thing given the general quality of mass-processed kosher foods.

If nothing else, the existence of the Jewish Hero Corps serves as definitive proof that Jews do not have a monopoly on the media.

Look! It's the back of the box!