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Weekend Movie Guide: Go, Speed Racer! Go!
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Emile Hirsch surveys a giant green screen...DEAD AHEAD! | Photo courtesy of Warner Brothers
Anyone else as not excited as I am about Speed Racer? I mean, I watched the cartoon when I was kid, but it was no Gaikingor Starblazers. Even as a nine year-old I recognized the premise as a little stupid (chimps and helicopters?), and the visual design of the movie by the Wachowski Brothers seems move seizure-inducing than sumptuous. Every summer there is one blockbuster that just tanks. My vote this year is for Speed Racer.
I think Punk'd is funny, but the appeal of Ashton Kutcher as an actor is simply lost on me. As for his co-star, Cameron Diaz--how did the winning actress of The Mask and There's Something About Mary become such a rote performer? I mean she basically just plays "Cameron Diaz" now, right? In What Happens in Vegas the two play a pair who have a one-night stand in Vegas, get married and win a lucky jackpot only to--oh, forget it.
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After a bad lunch, an angry crew sets fire to the Persian catering tent. | Photo courtesy of Roadside Attractions
I have no idea what to make of The Fall. It's spent a long time waiting to get into theaters (usually a bad sign), but it's also being hailed by the likes of David Fincher and Spike Jonze (usually a great sign). I enjoyed The Cell, but more as a piece of Barney-esque visual design than as a cohesive film. That seems to be the general critical consensus that's gathering around The Fall--pretty to look at but ultimately superficial. Or, Jessica Alba.
If the collected works of Eli Roth weren't quite gonzo enough for you, then maybe you should check out Frontiers. How's this for a summary: "After an unsuccessful heist, a group of young criminals hide out in a local hostel, but they would've been far better off facing the police since the place is owned by neo-Nazis who are hungry for human flesh." The weird thing is--this exact same thing happened to me last year in Marseilles!
I don't know about you, but The Babysitters sure seems like more of a Cinemaxmovie than one that should be going into theaters. Basically, a teenager decides to turn her babysitting business into a call-girl ring after she hooks up with one of her customers. Only the presence of John Leguizamo and Cynthia Nixon gives this sort of schlock any sheen of respectability. I'm assuming the nudity is plentiful so at least it has that going for it.
Here's the thing about "visionaries" like Dorian Paskowitz--sure he's kind of noble and unspoiled in a certain sense, but he's basically brainwashed his kids into living the life that he choose for them. In Surfwise we meet his family and explore the odd life that they live: living in a camper on the beach and surfing to their heart's content. Oh yeah, they also adhere to the strict diet and lifestyle of animals in the wild! Party!
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