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Movie Review: Balls of Fury
Upon leaving the theater after seeing Norbit way back in February, I was fairly certain that I had just seen the worst movie of 2007. A few months later, however, I staggered out of Evan Almighty and felt compelled to change my mind. Norbit may have had only one real laugh in it, but Evan had zero. Now, a few months after that supremely dull afternoon, I'm forced to revise my opinion again. Balls of Fury is the worst movie of 2007. It somehow manages to have less than zero laughs. It is joyless, witless and worthless.
Much like the infinitely superior Blades of Glory and Dodgeball (and they were only okay), Balls of Fury takes a silly sport and tries--tries--to have fun with it. I'm sure I don't need to tell you that it fails utterly in this respect. Will Ferrell and Jon Heder ice-dancing is funny. Rusty Daytona (Dan Fogler) repeatedly falling down and getting kicked in the nuts is not. The "story" begins with a young Daytona choking badly during the ping-pong finals at the 1988 Olympics, resulting in the death of his father who had wagered on the outcome.
You know what--screw that. I have no interest in spending any more time re-living the nightmare that was this movie. In short, Dan Fogler was obnoxious and unfunny; Maggie Q was cute but pointless; James Hong and Christopher Walken had to be gritting their teeth in embarrassment; Terry Crews and Thomas Lennon were wasted; and I felt bad for Dietrich Bader and George Lopez. The Reno: 911 crew was behind this film. While I like their show and even gave a good review to the big-screen version of it, Balls of Fury is a complete disaster.
AVOID AT ALL COSTS!
Photo courtesy of Rogue Pictures