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Arts and Entertainment

Curse of the Singles Table

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So I’ve made it through wedding season without any visible scars. Since I’ve just recently begun my twenty-something rite of passage through these events, I’ve only been to a handful and yes, I’ve been seated at the “singles” table at each and every one. For the most part, I’ve been seated with my girlfriends and other “singles” I knew. Of course there was smattering of the random cousins from Kentucky, the divorced single Dad, and the sixteen-year old family friend, but hey, nothing's perfect.

Something that truly helped me through the season of coupledom was Suzanne Schlosberg’s witty and irreverent memoir of 1,001 nights without sex, aptly titled "The Curse of the Singles Table". I read this true story of a single woman trying to find “the one” throughout the recent wedding season. Not only did it give me moments of laughter and that all too familiar “I know what that’s like” feeling in my gut, but it also gave me some good perspective on the endless search and to what lengths (and distances!) some will go to find their soul mate.

In "Curse", Schlosberg walks us through the mother of all dry spells, the over one thousand nights she spent without sex. Is she a troll, you wonder? Absolutely not. In fact, most would consider Suzanne a “catch”. An attractive, athletic, and successful writer in her early thirties who just literally couldn’t get any for over three years. And its not like she didn’t put herself out there either: Suzanne tried online dating, set-ups, speed dating, she even traveled cross country on different athletic and charitable adventures in search of not necessarily a man, but…something. Something that would make her more confident when getting seated at those endless singles tables.

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Of course Suzanne could have just bedded anyone, I mean, they’re men, aren’t they? Yet after almost a year of the dry spell, she wasn’t necessarily “saving” herself, but, she figured, why waste the big moment on just anyone? Suzanne wondered if it was like riding a bike -- would she even remember how to do it? Her honest observations and warm insights carry this book into my favorite territory -- where I’m summarizing parts to friends, recommending it to most single women I know, and re-reading the parts that most entertained me. We’ve all had dry spells, and yes, Suzanne’s may have been longer than most, but "The Curse of the Singles Table" is relatable, humorous, and left me never feeling sorry for myself again after a mere four-month dry spell.