We Asked: What Self-Help Book Changed Your Life? Here’s What Listeners Said

Ah, the early days of the new year: a time to start fresh with a new habit or, for the more ambitious among us, become a totally new person. Whatever goals one might have for 2024, there’s sure to be a book that details how to get there, which is why LAist’s daily news show AirTalk put the call out to listeners for the self-help books that changed their lives.

Because after all, our minds, bodies and spirits don’t come with a user’s manual.

An expert opinion

Jolenta Greenberg is an expert on self-help. The comedian and co-author of the book, How to be Fine: What We Learned From Living By the Rules of 50 Self-Help Books (and cohost of the podcast of the same name) has at this point followed the advice of almost 100 self-help books.

“What have I learned? I've learned a lot,” Greenberg said. From how to refold all her clothes thanks to Marie Kondo’s The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up to how to better communicate with her husband: “I learned my husband and I have very different love languages.”

Going through her library, a couple of titles stand out for Greenberg.

What to Say When You Talk to Your Self by Shad Helmstetter

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Courtesy of Simon and Schuster

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What to Say When You Talk to Your Self by Shad Helmstetter made a big impression. “This book is about negative self talk, why we do it, the sort of neural pathways that get built as we grow that entrench us in negative self talk," Greenberg said. "And it teaches you how to slowly change that with time and habit and talk to yourself nicer.”

She also recommended A Girl's Guide to Joining the Resistance: A Feminist Handbook on Fighting for Good by Emma Gray. “This is a great place to start if you identify as a woman and you want to learn more about politics,” she explained.

Workin' 9 to 5

Given how much time and energy we spend on our professional lives, it’s no surprise that listeners had some picks on how to better navigate the workplace.

What Color is Your Parachute? by Richard N. Bolles made a big impact on Sandra in Mar Vista. She explained, “It really made me think about my purpose in life and then how to make my work life try to copy that.”

Tristan, a listener in Valley Village, praised The Fred Factor: How Passion in Your Work and Life Can Turn the Ordinary into the Extraordinary by Mark Sanborn. "The biggest points that I drew from the book are that everyone makes a difference and that creating value for people most often doesn't cost a penny,” he said.

Interpersonally challenged

The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships by Harriet Lerner is a favorite of both Jolenta Greenberg and Claudia of Huntington Beach.

“It was really sort of groundbreaking for its time. It was one of the first books to talk about why women are angry, how we suppress it, how we could express it,” Greenberg said.

Claudia added, “So many self help books are kind of gooey. But she's very clear and practical and very empowering.”

A couple of listeners recommended books by Melody Beattie: The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations for Codependents and Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself.

“I never knew what the word codependent meant until I picked this up. Every page was like a splash of cold water on my face,” said Robert in Manhattan Beach of Codependent No More.

In the here and now

Many books that listeners mentioned touched on how to stay present in challenging moments.

Rob in Sherman Oaks put in a word for The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment by Eckhart Tolle. “What it really helped me do was to learn how to better stay in the present,” Rob said. “I find myself spending so much time ruminating about the past or fantasizing about the future, and that takes me out of the present.”

Do One Thing Different: Ten Simple Ways to Change Your Life by Bill O'Hanlon is Alex in Long Beach’s pick. “It really helps to get out of your own head and realize just how stuck you are in certain aspects of your life,” he said.

For Carmen in Berkeley, Living Beautifully with Uncertainty and Change by Pema Chödrön came at just the right moment. “It really changed my life at a time when I was going through a career change that was extremely difficult for me,” she said.

Write It Down, Make It Happen by Henriette Anne Klauser

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Courtesy of Simon and Schuster

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Other titles on staying present that came up were Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence by Dr. Anna Lembke and Excuse Me, Your Life Is Waiting by Lynn Grabhorn.

Too much stuff

Melissa in Long Beach learned from an online quiz that she “was a hoarder in the making,” which led her to Buried in Treasures: Help for Compulsive Acquiring, Saving, and Hoarding by David Tolin, Randy O. Frost, and Gail Steketee. “[It] helped me reframe the way that I acquire and discard things so I don't end up on an episode of Hoarders one day,” she said.

Setting those goals

Listener Beth shouted out Write It Down, Make It Happen: Knowing What You Want And Getting It by Henriette Anne Klauser. “[The book] reminds me to be specific about goals versus just saying things like I want a more organized home, or I need to get out of debt, or I want to get fitter.”

Of Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeown, Adam said, “Such a crystal clear read on how to focus on what really matters…the concept is really applicable to every part of life from health and nutrition to relationships.”

Listen to the conversation