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LA County to Porn Industry: Wrap it, or that's a Wrap

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Though LAist has never actually watched porn (ahem), we are led to believe that the use of condoms by performers somehow lessens the thrill of watching silicone enhanced women have sex with impossibly well-endowed men.Again, we have no first hand knowledge of whether this is true, but according to the Los Angeles Times, this argument against requiring porn performers to use protection has gone over like Ron Jeremy at a evangelical tent revival as far as LA County health officials are concerned.

They are similarly unimpressed by the contention of the porn industry that scenes in which condoms are employed take longer to shoot. Perhaps they feel as we do: this ain't David Lean waiting for the sun to rise to get that perfect shot in Lawrence of Arabia. It's porn!

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This week, in response to the porn industry's seeming disregard for the health of their employees, the County has fired off letters asking these companies to use condoms in their movies. The move is mostly symbolic, as the health department has no regulatory power over the adult entertainment industry.

Porn kingpins from Van Nuys to Arleta are protesting the letter. They say condoms will kill the biz.

Now, granted, porn is the San Fernando Valley's most popular product (far more popular than eye-searing smog and the 101/405 interchange), and no one wants to kill that golden goose. Besides providing Southland rock stars with a steady stream of buxom blondes in ridiculously high heels to date, porn helps give LA it's all important seamy, scudzy edge.

But aren't porn stars people, too? Is the profit margin of pornographers more important than the lives of the people who work for them? Don't they deserve to work in a safe, over-regulated industry like everyone else in this state?

And did we actually just write the line: "But aren't porn stars people, too?"