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Orange Alert: West Coast To Be Terrorized By Conan Blimp
Until now, only the East Coast was forced to suffer this aerial trauma, but an announcement earlier confirmed our greatest fear, the Conan blimp is coming to the West Coast. Blimps are terrifying. This emotion is best expressed in the 2005 cathartic classic, The Blimp Song.
Should you encounter the floating demon in the wild: Stop. Drop. Freak the eff out. But please remember to keep the laser pointer in your pants.