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LAist Film Calendar: The Egyptian Gets Medieval & The Nuart Gets Bitch Slapped

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Bloodied girls in tight clothes rule! | Photo courtesy of Epic Slap, LLC

The Hammer comes out swinging this week! Thursday, see Youth in Revolt - with your very own Michael Cera & Miguel Arteta! If the line's too long, hike it up to campus for another youthful, revolting picture, when Melnitz Movies hosts Australian Oscar submission Samson & Delilah and director Warwick Thornton. Sunday, Fly Away back to the Hammer for youth in rescue of geese - with a young Anna Pacquin (sadly not in attendance)! If that wasn't enough Hammer, UCLA's Film & Television Archive comes out slinging, with a series devoted to Billy The Kid & Jesse James. All classics, although for some strange reason, they omitted Billy The Kid vs. Dracula...

If the Western is much too modern, the Egyptian features a glourious medieval programme, sporting the legends of Robin Hood, Henry II, King Arthur & George Romero! Ye simply must bring ye whole family Saturday, when the Renaissance Pleasure Faire brings their finest food & wares to accompany Ireland's finest animation, The Secret of Kells. If these lords & ladies be too chivalrous for thy preference, get thee to the Beverly! Antichrist will rip any sense of equality from your body, and if you make it to midnight, Santa Sangre will obliterate any sense of sense from your brain. For an ever-so-slightly less offensive approach to misogyny, the Nuart has Bitch Slap, which is exactly what it sounds like, just with bigger breasts & more blood.

Full list appears below. See you at the movies!