Dum Dum Lollipops Are The Worst Halloween Candy — And We Have Proof

A typical Halloween candy haul. (Elina Shatkin/LAist)

Fun fact: When you tape a bowl of Halloween candy to a table and tell a bunch of journalists they can eat all the candy they want as long as they don't move the bowl, the first thing a bunch of journalists will do is MOVE THE HALLOWEEN CANDY BOWL.

We are a recalcitrant bunch. We are skeptical of authority and we don't like people telling us what do, which is (hopefully) part of what makes us good at our jobs. But these traits do not make it easy when a food editor wants to perform a semi-secret social experiment on her colleagues.

Which is exactly what we did.

The Halloween candy bowl used in our experiment. (Elina Shatkin/LAist)

We attached a large bowl of Halloween candy — filled with all the good stuff and lots of bad stuff (hi, raisins!) — to the middle of the editorial table in the KPCC/LAist newsroom. We put a sign next to it that said not to move the bowl. Then we periodically photographed what was in the bowl to monitor candy attrition and gauge the popularity of various treats. #methodology

Despite the contempt for our signage and duct tape, we gleaned important evidence from our "study," which was sensitively documented by visual journalist Chava Sanchez, the David Attenborough of the urban newsroom.

In past years, we have asked you, our readers, to rank your favorite and least favorite Halloween candy. The results have been clear. Reese's Peanut Butter Cups and Snickers come out on top. Smarties, Whoppers and Mike & Ike linger in the bottom.

These scientific-adjacent results square with our personal, anecdotal experiences, collected from childhood through the present day.

But we didn't have proof... until now.

Also the Halloween candy bowl used in our experiment. (Elina Shatkin/LAist)

As suspected, all the best chocolate candy in our experiment was quickly eaten. More than two weeks later, Dum Dum Lollipops and a package of saltine crackers (????) are all that's left.

Below is a video we made from the footage. We call it "The Dance Of The Desperate Dum Dum." May all your Halloween bags meet a kind and chocolate-y fate.