Jessica P. Ogilvie

If you harbor some JAWS-like fantasy in which you take a small boat out into the ocean and do away with the savage beast that is the Great White -- the one that's been killing innocents and eluding you and your team for weeks on end, such that you look like a fool in the eyes of the locals -- well, you're going to have to let it go. As of today, great white sharks are protected under the endangered species list in California.

The laws around where sex offenders can and cannot live are extremely stringent. They may not, for instance, live by parks or by schools, lest they come into contact with potential victims. And while the laws were likely set up with existing parks and schools in mind, one Los Angeles community is twisting the regulation around by building a new park with the sole intention of kicking sex offenders out of the neighborhood.

In tonight's Extra, Extra, sea lions are given a new home, a Great Dane is wounded, and a local news anchor goes missing. Plus: Keep up with us on Facebook, and follow us on Twitter: @LAist @LAistFood @LAistSports. You can also find us on Pinterest, Storify, Foursquare, and Instagram (laistpics).

For those of you who hate Joe Francis (and we know you are many), you will revel in the news that his hugely loathed company, "Girls Gone Wild," appears to be filing for bankruptcy.

When professional athletes wrap up their careers, they're often quite young, and many times they just sort of fade into oblivion. Nobody knows exactly where they go, and lots of times, people don't care. But now, some intrepid football throwers and catchers are taking a different route -- they're trying to learn how to make it in Hollywood.

If there's one thing this world cannot afford to lose, it's the master of Kim Kardashian's sexual tape, currently owned by and stored at Vivid Entertainment. So it is with a sigh of relief that we report that when a fire threatened to consume the porn company's vault, CEO Steve Hirsch made it over just in time to put it out and salvage the film in question.

In tonight's Extra, Extra, Marvel releases a new comic, an Oscar actress prompts handbag sales, and fire pits in Newport Beach are considered. Plus: Keep up with us on Facebook, and follow us on Twitter: @LAist @LAistFood @LAistSports. You can also find us on Pinterest, Storify, Foursquare, and Instagram (laistpics).

In today's "nothing new to see here" news, Madonna has angered a Power that Is by being sexual in the public domain. The Material Girl apparently offended some higher-ups at Instagram by the images she was putting up.

When it comes to Hugh Hefner, Kendra Wilkinson does not play around. The 26-year-old former Playmate told a radio show host this morning that when Crystal Harris left Hef days before they were supposed to get married, she "wanted to kill her."

Porn performer James Deen has recently become the mainstream's newest crossover sweetheart, but he hasn't forgone his roots. Next Wednesday, Deen will speak at a class called "Navigating Pornography" at Pasadena City College - his alma mater - on the topics of porn and healthy human sexuality. Here, Deen talks to us about his upcoming lecture, the role of porn stars in educating America and what’s next for him in the movie world.

Hidden away in various corners of the city are small groups of people hunkering down for wine and cheese and discussing literature as part of those things they call "book clubs." So let's take a look at what some of them around the Southland are reading, per your submissions.

In tonight's Extra, Extra, a dad makes a poor choice, the Lakers commemorate Jerry Buss, and UCLA students raise money for AIDS. Plus: Keep up with us on Facebook, and follow us on Twitter: @LAist @LAistFood @LAistSports. You can also find us on Pinterest, Storify, Foursquare, and Instagram (laistpics).