The holiday season may be the most wonderful time of the year, but it is arguably also the most expensive.
If the thought of shopping til you drop makes you want to hide under the covers ‘til 2026, you're not alone.
According to a survey by personal finance company WalletHub, 65% of people of those surveyed say economic woes are making the holidays "less fun" this year and 61% say they wish they could completely opt out of gift giving. And 21% said they don't expect to pay off their holiday debt until spring 2026.
So what can we do when our hearts urge us to play Santa, but our wallets vote for Scrooge? LAist asked the experts.
Licensed marriage and family therapist, Tustin-based Maritza Plascencia of Mindful Quest Relationship Counseling said anxiety around money and the holidays is commonplace. So how to get over the guilt or embarassment about saying you want to rein in the gift buying? “My advice for every scenario that has come up has been: honesty ... because they are going to find out that others are feeling exactly how they are feeling.”
So what to do next? Consider proposing a more budget-friendly exchange among your friends and relatives or ways to celebrate in the spirit of the season. Here are 6 fun alternatives to out-of-control gift giving.
1. Secret Santa
Many large families organize a Secret Santa swap. Here's how it works: names are drawn out of a hat and paired until everyone participating has been assigned one person to buy for. Typically, an agreed-upon budget is established. But feel free to improvise. Perhaps gifts could revolve around a chosen theme? And yes — you do ultimately reveal the names of gift givers, either from the start or at the end of the gift exchange. Bonus: This method works well whether the plan is to exchange gifts in-person as a group, or ship them to far flung family members.
2. White Elephant exchange
This works best in person. A budget is decided upon and all participants bring a wrapped gift. Make sure everyone knows what kind of gift exchange it will be. Serious, "real" gifts? Such as a gift card to a movie theater, or a coffee mug? Or funny, funky gag gifts?
At the gathering, gifts are placed in a pile and participants draw a number to determine the gift opening order. The first person up chooses a gift from the pile and opens it. The next person up has the choice of "stealing" the gift, or selecting an unopened gift (and the person who went first gets to choose again). Then, the game resumes with No. 3. When everyone has a gift, the person who went first has the opportunity to keep the gift they have, or make the final "steal."
3. Choose your own adventure
Instead of spending on gifts, agree upon an activity or an event, such as going to a concert, a play, theme park, sporting event or restaurant. Everybody pays their own way and the emphasis is on spending time together making memories.
4. Ornament exchange
Using ornaments as the theme, this gift exchange could take the form of a White Elephant swap-style or a Secret Santa. Set a budget, then get festive. Holiday sweaters optional.
5. Kids only
The holidays are an especially magical time for kids. One gift giving strategy is to agree on buying gifts ... for kids only. Again, this can take the form of Secret Santa — where adult members of the group are assigned a budget and a specific child to gift; or the adults can agree to buy a gift for each child. The catch here is defining who the kids are, and when they “age out” of the practice. (Do they exit the gifting pool after turning 18? After the birth of their own child?) Clarification in advance will avoid hurt feelings.
6. No gifts, period
You might be surprised at how many of your friends and relatives vote for this one. Doesn't mean you can't get together for a holiday potluck or cookies exchange, though! You just need to have the courage to say, "Hey, would you consider trying something different this year when it comes to all the holiday shopping?"
Editor's note: This story was first published in 2023 and has since been updated.