Costco is now stocking British baked beans. For some in LA, it’s an ode to joy

Jubilations to the sky! Have you heard the news? Costco is now selling Heinz baked beans. Thank you Costco! And not just that… the British kind!

(Ask any Brit you know who has tried American baked beans. They just taste .... different. Much too sweet. We don’t tend to show much emotion generally but a disappointment like that is not easily gotten over. I’ve seen weeping in the streets.)

And if there are now easily accessed British baked beans in L.A., that means there will be beans on toast at my house. I know that Americans generally don’t get it. As someone once said to me, "you can have beans. You can have toast. But why would you put the beans on the toast?" Because, dear American, you did not grow up in a country where you can put pretty much anything on toast.

Baked beans are now being sold at Costco!

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Steve Holtzman

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Courtesy Suzanne Levy

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You see, we got used to putting things on toast during World War II — rationing and making do and all that. Bread was cheap and available, so why not make it the base of some delicious dishes? Mashed banana on toast? Yummy. Sardines? With a bit of vinegar, lovely. And how about spaghetti hoops? That one really blows American minds. "Wait, you put pasta on toast? Carb on carb?" Yes sir, and it tastes heavenly. The tomato sauce slowly seeps into the toast below, making for a wonderfully gooey texture. It is a work of art.

(There’s also cheese on toast, also known as Welsh rabbit, which I always thought was odd given we were not in Wales and there was no long-eared animal involved, but apparently it’s a corruption of the word rarebit. In case you were wondering).

Like mac and cheese

Baked beans on toast. Yum

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Steve Holtzman

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Courtesy Suzanne Levy

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But for us beans on toast is the most loved option. We all grow up on it, an affordable go-to for weary mums. In many ways, beans on toast is our mac and cheese. Bland yet tasty, the perfect comfort food. For years as an adult, when I went back home for a visit from America, I’d ask my mum to have beans on toast waiting for me when I walked in.

I’m happy to say I’ve got my daughter into baked beans on toast. She resisted at first but now loves it. My American husband has never really developed a taste but understands its centrality in my life. Early on when we were dating, I asked him for egg, beans and toast. As in scrambled eggs, baked beans and toast, a classic breakfast combo.

When he’d made it he walked in and asked if it should be toast, egg and then the beans on top, or toast, beans and then the egg. I almost sputtered. Of course the beans have to go on top of the egg! What are we, peasants? The heavy egg would squash the beans and unbalance the whole precarious structure! He’s never made that mistake again. And has become an expert in making a lovely cup of tea.

So if you see me, feel free to join me in celebrating this major baked bean news. I may have baked beans on toast every night for dinner this week. Just because! It brings a little bit of Britain to my home. There is a New Yorker cartoon which has a man asking a waiter for baked beans on toast. “I’m not British,” he says. “I’m just crazy.” That cartoon is now on my wall.