Congress has cut federal funding for public media — a $3.4 million loss for LAist. We count on readers like you to protect our nonprofit newsroom. Become a monthly member and sustain local journalism.
This archival content was written, edited, and published prior to LAist's acquisition by its current owner, Southern California Public Radio ("SCPR"). Content, such as language choice and subject matter, in archival articles therefore may not align with SCPR's current editorial standards. To learn more about those standards and why we make this distinction, please click here.
Living in Sin: Verbal Viagra

Every week in Living in Sin, Jen Sincero provides advice for LA's sexually curious. Now you can see her column in print in the LA Alternative Press. Ask Jen your questions: all are posted anonymously.
Dear Jen,
As I've grown older (I'm now 52) I've noticed that I require more verbal stimulation during sex with my wife in order to orgasm. This stimulation usually takes the form of my wife describing, in detail, her past sexual adventures, or pretending that I am the hunky waiter that served us at dinner. She will tell me how her past lovers were much better than I am, or she'll call me by the waiter's name and tell him (me) how much bigger he is compared to her husband. Is this wrong to do?
- Verbal ViagraDear Verb: In a perfect world, instead of letters like yours, I'd be getting the following:
Dear Jen, My wife and I have a very respectable sex life. We never discuss it and only do it with the lights out. We condemn and fear masturbation, homosexuality, toys, role playing, fetishism, filth, and flogging. We have never screamed "who's your daddy?!" in a moment of passion, never pulled hair, spanked fannies, or gotten rugburns, and would rather take a bullet than stick anything up our butts.
Yet it's people like you — the healthy, the brave, the whisperers of degrading and filthy nothings - that are worried there's something wrong. Which is the only thing that's wrong. Everything else gets two thumbs up — your openness, your sexual camaraderie with your wife, your budding fetishism, your lack of jealousy, and your ability to refer to another man as hunky. I urge you to go online and seek out your
fellow dominants and submissives if you haven't done so already (do a search for those two words or BDSM). You'll quickly learn that you are part of a vast, kinky family — the kind of family you've always dreamed of. They'll cheer you on, give you new ideas, and instead of getting drunk and flinging family dramas across the table at you on the holidays, they're more likely to show up naked on all fours and beg you to kick them. But most importantly, they'll help you accept the fact that if having your wife stick her boot in your mouth and call you a pathetic louse is wrong, you don't want to be right.
photo by brokenchopstick via flickr
As Editor-in-Chief of our newsroom, I’m extremely proud of the work our top-notch journalists are doing here at LAist. We’re doing more hard-hitting watchdog journalism than ever before — powerful reporting on the economy, elections, climate and the homelessness crisis that is making a difference in your lives. At the same time, it’s never been more difficult to maintain a paywall-free, independent news source that informs, inspires, and engages everyone.
Simply put, we cannot do this essential work without your help. Federal funding for public media has been clawed back by Congress and that means LAist has lost $3.4 million in federal funding over the next two years. So we’re asking for your help. LAist has been there for you and we’re asking you to be here for us.
We rely on donations from readers like you to stay independent, which keeps our nonprofit newsroom strong and accountable to you.
No matter where you stand on the political spectrum, press freedom is at the core of keeping our nation free and fair. And as the landscape of free press changes, LAist will remain a voice you know and trust, but the amount of reader support we receive will help determine how strong of a newsroom we are going forward to cover the important news from our community.
Please take action today to support your trusted source for local news with a donation that makes sense for your budget.
Thank you for your generous support and believing in independent news.

-
The union representing the restaurant's workers announced Tuesday that The Pantry will welcome back patrons Thursday after suddenly shutting down six months ago.
-
If approved, the more than 62-acre project would include 50 housing lots and a marina less than a mile from Jackie and Shadow's famous nest overlooking the lake.
-
The U.S. Supreme Court lifted limits on immigration sweeps in Southern California, overturning a lower court ruling that prohibited agents from stopping people based on their appearance.
-
Censorship has long been controversial. But lately, the issue of who does and doesn’t have the right to restrict kids’ access to books has been heating up across the country in the so-called culture wars.
-
With less to prove than LA, the city is becoming a center of impressive culinary creativity.
-
Nearly 470 sections of guardrailing were stolen in the last fiscal year in L.A. and Ventura counties.