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LAist Predictions for 2009

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We've spent much of the past few weeks reviewing the year that was, in music, movies, TV, food, and more. We've talked New Year's resolutions but now's the time to get real: What is really gonna go down over the next 12 months? Below are some of our early predictions -- what are yours?

  • MTA installs turnstiles at all Metro subway stations, securing millions of dollars of unrealized revenue from erstwhile freeloaders.
  • Construction begins on Ed Roski's NFL stadium east of downtown.
  • Squashing all deathbed rumors, Bill Gates and Steve Jobs arm-wrestle at the Staples Center in what becomes the highest rated PayPerView event of all time. Michael Jackson sings the National Anthem.
  • In the first sign of victory in the war on terror, the TSA is ordered to allow travelers to keep their shoes on as they pass through security.
  • Bob Hertzberg, Eric Garcetti, and Tavis Smiley all launch mayoral campaigns.
  • Expo Line construction stalls. No progress is made in finalizing Phase 2, which will involve building track to the ocean via either Cheviot Hills or Culver City.
  • Manny stays in LA. But with a shaky pitching staff, the Dodgers struggle to win the division again, before losing in the NLDS. To the Mets.
  • The Angels win the most games in team history and nobody notices. Until they lose to the Red Sox.
  • The Lakers fail to win 70 games but defeat the Celtics in 7 in the most exciting NBA Finals of all time the century.
  • Offshoots of the Mexican cartel wars stretch into San Diego and Riverside Counties.
  • After the internet broadcast of the Tennenbaum trial, the RIAA is exposed as scandalous, fear-baiting felons disguised as a trade organization, EMI drops out and demands a refund, followed by the other Big 3.
  • Questionable investment practices by members of the Church of Scientology are exposed and slowly be surely the impact dwarfs the Madoff scandal, in what becomes known as the L. Ron scheme.
  • U2 becomes the first band to outsell AC/DC at Wal-Mart. Clueless teenagers across the land wonder why a lame band of old farts named itself UTube.
  • The Guild and at least two more LA-produced online video series are picked up by major networks and succeed wildly.

Photo by circulating via flickr.

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