‘Not Even Water?’ How To Be An Ally To Your Muslim Colleague This Ramadan

Yusra Farzan covers Orange County and its 34 cities, watching those long meetings — boards, councils and more — so you don’t have to.

Published Mar 11, 2024 1:21 PM

A group of people, most of them wearing hijabs, are sitting on a red embrodered carpet and turned to the left, backs to the camera.

Ramadan has started and many Muslims are bracing themselves for the question, “Not even water?” It’s been turned into sweatshirts, countless memes and even a guide to help non-Muslims better understand Ramadan.

Muslims worldwide have started fasting from sunrise to sunset and abstain from eating and drinking. And yes, that means not even water.

Here are ways you can support your Muslim colleague or friend during this holy month:

Engage

"Ramadan Kareem" or "Ramadan Mubarak" are phrases you can use to wish your Muslim colleague or friend.

One of my favorite things about Ramadan is the elevated sense of community. Some could be immigrants, away from their families and you can support them by enjoying iftar together or asking them to share their traditions with you. One of my favorite memories is going for late-night prayers and then enjoying halwa puri (traditional Pakistani breakfast of deep-fried bread, chickpeas and a sweet semolina pudding) with my friends — and it’s a story I love to share.

'Not even water?'

As a community, we collectively laugh at this question just because of how frequently we get asked it. For Muslims, fasting is about more than just giving up food and water for a part of the day. It is about abstaining from false deeds, avoiding dispute and letting go of bitterness or resentment. It is an opportunity for us to reset and examine our worldly attachments. Ramadan is about moral and ethical discipline as much as it’s about physical abstinence.

Terminology

Some common terms you hear during the month of Ramadan:

Suhoor, sehri, sahar — the meal at sunrise that begins the fast
Iftar, iftari — the meal at sunset that ends the fast
Tharaweeh — optional but recommended evening prayers, usually offered as a group

Don’t make assumptions

If you know someone who identifies as a Muslim, do not assume that they are fasting. Muslims are exempt from fasting for different reasons, such as if they are sick, pregnant, traveling or breastfeeding. People also practice their faith in different ways, while some choose to observe the fast, others don’t.

'What a great way to lose weight'

Comments about weight are never OK. For Muslims, the fast is a way to connect with God and check their privilege even — it is a time of charity. While food is a big part of Ramadan activities for many cultures, it isn’t the most central part.

Be empathetic

If you must plan a social or gathering during fasting hours, be thoughtful about making food the central focus or organizing to-go boxes for those fasting.

As the day progresses, Muslims tend to have low energy levels — for some like me, the caffeine withdrawal hits hard. Schedule group project meetings in the morning ideally or after iftar hours if possible.

This story first published at USC Annenberg Media on April 1, 2022.