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Facebook Announces The Next Big Change That Will Piss You Off: Your Timeline

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Remember what your Facebook profile looked like back in 2007? Yeah, we don't really either. But you probably remember every time Facebook implemented a big change with how the site functions and looks you spent at least three days reading angry status updates from your friends about how much they hate Facebook for altering the experience they pay nothing for, but are oh-so-very accustomed to.

Today at F8, the Facebook conference, the social networking übersite announced the next big change, and OMFG you thought you were pissed yesterday when they effed up your news feed. It's the Timeline, which will allow users to prioritize key life moments chronicled on the site, or, as Facebook says, "collect all your best moments in a single place."

Say what, now? Well, Facebook surmises that if you're trying to catch up with a friend, old or new, you'd rather know about them landing their dream job--which maybe happened three weeks ago--than what they had for breakfast. (Pfft, not like your friends post up inane shit like that, right? ... Oh, well, nevermind.)

Here's how Facebook describes the changes:

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Timeline is wider than your old profile, and it's a lot more visual. The first thing you'll notice is the giant photo right at the top. This is your cover, and it's completely up to you which of your photos you put here. As you scroll down past your cover, you'll see your posts, photos and life events as they happened in time. You choose what's featured on your timeline. You can star your favorites to double their size or hide things altogether.

Is this going to make it harder for you to creep on your crazy co-worker's booze cruise photos, or stalk your ex, or read about what 100 books your Aunt Mary would take with her on a deserted island? Probably not, though the experience might look and feel a little different.

Don't panic yet, since Timeline won't get rolled out for a few weeks. Save up some of that rage for then. But if you want to get a jump on it, we found a way to enact the timeline now.