Overheard in L.A.: How We're (Probably) Getting Scammed

This week's edition of Overheard in L.A. features snippets of conversation overhead at the opera, from the bowels of Hollywood and, as always, Whole Foods.
Or Your Money Back?
"4 weeks in my class and you'll get a pilot. Guaranteed."
via @leliabroussard
Aesthetic Choices
"As a songwriter, I don't think I'd use the word 'concentration camp.'"
At Cinespia via @yenniecheung
Die, Mimi, Die
"It isn't 19th century opera unless there's a corpse on the stage!"
At La Boheme via @dearcalliope
Oh Hey There, Red Flag, I Almost Didn't See You Come In
"I'm not a stalker, I'm a man in love."
via @AMPRGroup
Dating in L.A.?
"Hi, I'm gonna juice when I get home, so you're welcome to come over."
At Whole Foods via @jbb91
Past Life Recollections
"I haven't seen her in—she's from the adult business, back in the day."
Cell phone conversation via @suddenchad
How We Rough It
"I would go camping ALL the time if I had a full-body cashmere sleeping bag."
via @Kippardue
Why We Live in Los Angeles
"I'm allergic to the rain."
via @KLDi
Better Luck Next Time
Person 1: "I got hit by a car on my bike today."
Person 2: "Oh! By a celebrity?!"
In Hollywood via @SoCassandra
Aesthetic Choices Part II
"You don't want to kill a dog just to prove a point."
via @BostonCourt
Modern-Day Prophets
"That's a very popular corner to stand and yell on."
Glendale at Brand and Broadway where a man was yelling in Spanish about Jesus via @tropicostation
Aesthetic Choices Part III
"Ugly people can have love triangles too!"
via @heysanjay
Why We Sell Our Souls
"I am a hummus whore!"
via @IAMREDVISION
Sneaky, Sneaky
Person 1: "Does the picture look like a before pic?"
Person 2: "Oh! That's a trap."
via @stefanpinto
Facial Hair-Related Violence Is A Serious Crime
"I wanted to punch his ironic mustache off his face."
via @A_Felds
Why We're Busy
"I can't play tennis tomorrow. I have to go to the American Idol finale."
In a Calabasas locker room via @MotorHeadMama
Hunger Games
Girl 1: "I'm about to PASS OUT after not eating all day. How do you guys DO it?"
Girl 2: "It's really not that hard."
via @kellyzimmer
Hello There, Disturbing Mental Image
"That sounds like a fat seal masturbating."
via @joshlobis
Redundant Phrases
"It's a scripted reality show."
via @ChucktheDrummer
Unlike!
"Don't mess, with me today, man, I just lost $7800 on Facebook"
In Beverly Hills via @dereksheath
More Past Life Recollections
Woman on cell phone: "You read a lot. You were always an avid reader. You even read a lot back when you were on drugs."
At the West Hollywood Target via Cece Sherman
Oh Gawd
"I guess I'm just jaded because I've been to Hong Kong SO many times."
In the Japanese Garden at the Huntington via Stephanie L.
Brilliant Foresight
"I'm so glad I didn't shroom."
At Universal City Walk via Jamesthefouth
How the Rich Abuse Each Other
Person 1: "He called my dog disgusting and then asked me for a blow job!"
Person 2: "Well you gave it to him, right?"
At La Scala in Beverly Hills
Our Overheard in L.A. feature relies on you to send us the strange conversations you overhear in this city. Send them our way at tips@laist.com. (In the e-mail, put "overheard" in the subject and tell us who said it, where they said it and any amusing context.)
Previously:
Overheard in L.A.: What We're Forcing Ourselves to Eat
Overheard in L.A.: Our Natural Reaction to the Venice Boardwalk
Overheard in L.A.: Drinko De Mayo Edition
Overheard in L.A. at Coachella: "You're Not My Bro, Dude"
Overheard in L.A.: Because We're Too VIP for VIP
Overheard in L.A.: Entering the Honeybadger Phase of Our Careers
Overheard in L.A.: What We REFUSE to Wear
Overheard in L.A.: Gays of Our Lives
Overheard in L.A.: Things That Are Worse Than Bad Lighting