Dodgers Celebration Irks Diamondbacks

You would have thought the Dodgers stole all of the Diamondbacks players' wives and girlfriends and recreated some of the more debaucherous scenes from Caligula judging by all of the outrage coming from Phoenix yesterday.

Apparently the Dodgers got a lot of people angry because they decided to run out to the swimming pool out in right-center field and took a celebratory dive.

"They've clinched the division this year, but if that's how they're going to act and be classless, that's their gig; that's their clubhouse," Willie Bloomquist said. "I just think it's disrespectful and classless."

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D-Backs president and former Dodgers executive Derrick Hall sent an email: "I could call it disrespectful and classless, but they don't have a beautiful pool at their old park and must have really wanted to see what one was like."

Arizona Republic Columnist Dan Bickley in a column entitled "The Dodgers are idiots": "A handful of others thought it OK to mock another team’s playoff tradition, jumping in the Chase Field pool after winning the National League West on Thursday." Sorry Bickley, but it's hardly a tradition if you've only done it once in 2011. I think someone needs a refresher course of Fiddler on the Roof.

Even Senator John McCain joined in on the fun Friday morning.

That's rich. A Senator in the do-nothing Congress is calling a sports team "overpaid, immature, arrogant spoiled brats."

This begs the question: why is everyone's panties all bunched up in a knot?

First of all, if I were the Diamondbacks I would much rather have a team celebrate in a swimming pool rather than in the visitor's clubhouse. It's cheaper to clean up and will prevent the clubhouse from smelling like rotting death the next day. Truth: after the Dodgers clinched in 2009, I could still get a whiff of the stale champagne when I walked into the clubhouse in the 2010 season.

Second, why are baseball players so fucking sensitive? They have so many unwritten rules, that even when I'm walking around during batting practice I'm unsure if I'm breaking one of their hallowed rules.

Apparently you're not allowed to look at a home run for too long. You're not allowed to bunt to try and break up a no-hitter or perfect game. You're not allowed to step on the foul lines. You're not allowed show too much joy when you hit an RBI double to give your team a lead. You're not allowed to look at the catcher after he tried to tag you out on a play at the plate.

Bascially anything that can be construed as a slight towards the opposition will be taken as a criminal offense.

When did sports become international diplomacy?

I thought the whole point of sports was to provide entertainment, to provide an escape to our otherwise droll and insignificant lives. Heaven forbid someone wants to show the world they're having fun, that they're excited that they made a great play.

Here are a couple of examples of oversensitive baseball players:

Out of all the sewage of outrage came a voice of clarity from D-Backs starter Brandon McCarthy:

Thank heavens for a rare voice of sanity in the state of Arizona.