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2 Bros Post Craigslist Ad Looking For Coachella Girlfriends Who Are '30% Sorority'
Girls sitting on shoulders at the Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival (Photo by Frazer Harrison/Getty Images for Coachella)
Hey, bros need some love too. In a Craigslist ad posted in the SFV today, two "slightly above average bros" put out a request for "two stand-in Coachella girlfriends" who are "30% Sorority."
We're glad they're planning ahead. After all, the lineup and ticket sales were just announced on Wednesday. The early bird catches the hottest fake-girlfriend. They're also offering girls the chance to sit on their shoulders. Oh my!
In addition, the man-children asked for the girls to be "7.5% mom/nurse (to take care of us), 12.5% sexual and 50% fucking awesome."
The girlfriends would also have to enjoy the same type of music and interests as these dudes:
Outkast, $9 Heinekens , Zedd, An Asshole with a whistle in the sahara tent, Disclosure, Kid Cudi, Calvin Harris, Awkward Friends from High School, Ellie Goulding, Skipping lunch entirely, Lorde, Some deep house DJ in the Yuma tent, Lana Del Rey and being completely separated from your friends.
This ad seems like is a parody of a similar Craigslist ad placed by two women earlier today who were looking for two Coachella boyfriends who were "30% bro" as well as "7.5% hipster/indie, 12.5% raver and 50% normal." Jezebel caught this gem, but the ad has since been flagged and taken down.
And additional requirements from the bros:
Sponsored message
- 21 years or older - 6 feet tall or less (willing to accept 6'1" if you are *actually* that height - no rounding down, let's be honest here)
- Don't care where you live, this is just for the weekend, possibly even just a day.
- Must already have your own Coachella Weekend 1 ticket
- General physical weight and balance to be a girl on our shoulders
- Know how to handle your shit (blacking out and forgetting the festival is the minor leagues betches)
-Little to no sleep
-Willing to brave the elements and camp for one day and just hope we can befriend some people to let us crash there
-make breakfast sandwiches at least one day
- Understands and appreciates the natural wonder that is living in a condo
- Understands and appreciates the natural wonder that is going to the Yuma Tent and pretending you're more fucked up than anyone else by playing the drums on the ground sitting indian style
- Embraces morning day-drinking and pregaming to Knife Party/Ke$ha
- Bonus for above-par sarcasm and looking like an idiot for your own entertainment
- Preference given to applicants applying as a pair of friends.
-To make things more ridiculous, we may handcuff each other for a few others and GoPro the experience
Related:
Coachella 2014 Lineup Announced With Arcade Fire, Outkast & Muse Headlining
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