Britney Spears Scares Local Kids

Imagine you're a little kid minding your own business (wait, what kid minds their own business?) and playing on the school yard when a rambling, confused, and chain-smoking woman shows up in a skimpy outfit looking for her kids. No, scratch that--looking for her lawyer's kids.

Oh, and that woman just happens to be Britney Spears.

That was the scene earlier this month at an elementary school in Beverly Hills, as described this week by Us Magazine. The troubled pop-diva now most famous for bizarre behavior and dashing in and out of local courtrooms had lost custody of her two sons, Sean Preston, 2, and Jayden James, 1, just days before the incident. Us Mag explains the somewhat unexplainable:

The singer parked her car outside the school just before 3 p.m. and spent 10 minutes smoking cigarettes and talking to herself while she waited for classes to let out.

“She was just rambling and confused,” says the witness, who approached Spears to ask if she was OK. “She said, ‘I’m here to pick up my kids.’ But then she changed her story and said, ‘They aren’t my kids; I have a new attorney, and I came to pick them up for her.’”

Adds the witness, “All I could think was, Who in their right mind would let her pick up their kids?” [...] But before getting into her car and driving off (without any children), she chatted up the female witness: “She said, ‘You’re so nice. You should give me your number. I don’t have very many friends.’"

Spears definitely didn't make any new friends on the playground that day, since most of the kids reportedly were pretty freaked out, and she had to be escorted out the school's back door.