I've written e-mails, made phone calls, and pledged. I even wrote a two-page essay at their 3-hour (paid) market research session at the Hyatt.

And still, every morning I'm summoned from my slumber by a soft voice announcing in code-like rhyme that my public radio station is having an orgy on the Web.

Sixty-three degrees at seven-thirty-three, on eighty-nine-Point-three, KP-CC, I'm Steve Julian.... Online at K-P....C-C dot O-R-G.

"Dot O-R-G?" You mean "dot org," I know, but it really sounds like "dot orgy," and no matter how half-awake I am I don't need a daily refresher on how to spell, thank you. Who spells out dot o-r-g anyway, and when will this "dog O-R-G" bubble burst? Can I have instructions on accessing an Internet WWW browser access point for the dot orgy?

Then there was that sunny Saturday morning when Kari Moran took listener belittlement to new levels, adding yet another ironic acronym to the mix: "F-M with I-Q."

What the hell is an FM with IQ? I nearly threw my AM/FM/cassette clock radio out the window the third time she said it. First, KNX claims high-definition AM radio and now I'm supposed to believe that FM actually has a brain?

I know, I know. Who cares? Probably just me and the handful of other hard-core NPR junkies I imagine are out there. But it's these little things -- over and over and oooovvvvveeeerrrr -- that make me feel like puking in my tote bag.