The Internet has brought a wealth of information to our fingertips, but just as this open access has improved our lives, it has also made things more complicated.
Such is the subject of director Jason Reitman’s latest film, “Men, Women & Children," based on the novel by Chad Kultgen. The film, whose ensemble cast is led by Jennifer Garner and Adam Sandler, is a look at how Internet technology and social media are transforming the way people connect — particularly when it comes to sex.
Reitman stopped by The Frame studios this week to talk about his latest film, which opens today in Los Angeles and New York.
Interview Highlights:
On how he does want people to tweet about the film, despite articles saying he doesn't:
You know what's funny? Okay, so I go to the Toronto Film Festival and I do three days of press, and a quote comes out, and I don't even remember saying that. Of course I want people to tweet about this film. Are you insane? Yes, watch the movie, get on your phone, and tweet to everyone you know that they should go see this film. I imagine it came out of a conversation in which I thought, Yeah, people should actually talk to each other about the movie. But I'm not anti-Internet in any way. I'm on the Internet all the time, I am on Twitter, and I think the Internet has created as much beauty as it's created relationship atrocities. No, I'm not anti-Twitter in any way.
On whether something in his personal life sparked his interest in the book ,"Men, Woman & Children":
Wow. How did my personal life actually find its way into the screen on this movie that is about how the Internet has changed our sex lives? Um...I'm sure it has, and look, I'm really not trying to cop out here, but I frankly usually only get perspective on the film way after it's done and it's kind of had a life of its own. Look, I have a daughter; I do think about how the Internet is going to change her childhood, and how different it will be from mine. And I'm conscientious of how much time I spend staring at my phone instead of actually spending time with people. I mean, someone told me recently that I never call, I always text. And that was kind of a scary bellwether, to hear that.
On how the book is written in a documentary style:
It allows [author Chad Kultgen] to get really dirty, actually, which is interesting, because I think if he was putting spin on it and you felt his judgment whatsoever, he could never get that dirty. It would seem as though he was somehow authorizing the behavior or judging the behavior. What's lovely about the book is it really doesn't come across as either...In our private lives, in our private moments, we do think some crazy things. That's what's interesting about the Internet. All judgments aside, it allows us to tap into our curiosity and desire in a way that nothing else ever has. You were unlikely to get in your car and cross the train tracks, or whatever metaphor you want to use, to go explore something that you had deep in your brain, but when it came to just typing into a URL, we follow our curiosity.
On the differences between how adults and teens talk about sex in the film:
I would have to imagine that — because you are reading and writing so much more about sexuality — it becomes a much easier conversation. Whereas when you and I were kids, it was a very difficult conversation to broach. And God knows I wanted to have that conversation, but it was hard to get in to.
The first time I saw a porno magazine, I was, God, probably 10, 11 years old, maybe 12. I biked down to a magazine stand out in Calabasas and [hid] the Penthouse in front of the Mad Magazine for about five, 10 minutes, and I remember thinking, I have to memorize these images, I have to burn them in, because these have to last me for months. The idea that a kid could now, knowingly or unknowingly, happen upon a site that would feature things that I could not — I'm a pretty imaginative guy — things that I couldn't come up with in my wildest dreams, I would have to imagine that changes the conversation that you have about sex as a teenager.
On the film addressing how the availability of Internet porn has affected young men:
This is a thing now, and there's been TED talks about this, that we have a generation of young guys in particular who are just going numb. They can't get turned on any more because they've seen so much wild stuff. We explored that more in the original screenplay of the film and that was actually an interesting thing, going from book to script and script to movie, there are certain things that you can read on the page that you cannot see on screen, and there were scenes that we tested that we had to cut because we were going into what kind of stuff he was watching...
It made people very uncomfortable. It's interesting, for a movie that really looks into a lot of different subjects, it looks into a lot of different sides of sexuality, but also looks into a little bit of bullying, it looks into anorexia, which is rampant online...teenage masturbation made people way more uncomfortable than anything.
On learning about the online pro-anorexia, or "thinspiration," communities:
Yeah, I had never heard the term 'thinspiration' before I read the book. And discovering 'thinspiration' and the 'Pro Ana' community is just...particularly as the father of a daughter was the most terrifying thing about reading the book. I mean really broke my heart, it was very hard for me to read, and Elena Kampouris, who played the role, just crushed it at her audition. She had a tiny role in [my film] "Labor Day," then she came in for audition and just blew me away in her ability to bring that to life immediately and understand the character and what she was going through.
On the conversations he had with the young actors' parents about the more uncomfortable scenes:
This is really funny. For the first time ever in my career I had an actor, Elena [Kampouris], I think she was 16 when she read for this movie. She auditioned, she was amazing, and then I said, 'So have your parents read the script yet?' And she said, 'No, but I've described it to them.' And I said, 'Okay. This is a first for me, but I'm gonna need you to step outside and send your mother in.' And the mom came into the callback and we had a long conversation about her daughter's role and all the things she'd be doing, and they were a very thoughtful family who had talked a lot about the subjects of the movie and Elena is well beyond her years, so it became an easy conversation to have with her and her parents. But I've never had to do that, never told an actor, 'Please send your parents in.'
On collaborating with Erin Cressida Wilson on the script:
"I'm a huge fan of Erin, and I had worked with her on this film "Chloe" that I was an executive producer on that Atom Egoyan directed. And I ran into Erin at Sundance. Honestly, 30 seconds into this conversation, I remember this book, 'Men, Women, and Children,' which I've now known for years and I've talked to the author about, and I've been trying to figure out, How am I going to crack this thing?'And I just see her and it hits me, I was like, Of course! I should be writing it with Erin...We collaborated so quickly.
The trickiest thing was keeping track of all the characters, so we created a map for that, but then, honestly — and I'm not sure if any writer does this — we broke the book into four quadrants. She took the first and third, I took the second and fourth, we each wrote those sections, passed them to each other, rewrote them, stitched them together, realized that we somehow missed chapter five. I went and wrote chapter five, we threw that in, we did a few days of polishing, and the script was done and we went and made the movie. It happened so quickly, she and I were just...I can't imagine ever being on the same page the way I was with her.
On how he compares as a parent to Jennifer Garner's character, who micromanages her daughter's online interactions:
The Jennifer Garner character is a polarizing character: she's a mother who monitors every text message, every e-mail, every keystroke her daughter makes. For non-parents, they seem to look at her character and [say], 'This woman is absolutely insane, and she borderlines mythical, I can't believe you'd put her in the movie.' For parents, they [say], 'This woman is completely reasonable, where do I download that software?' I don't want to micromanage my daughter's childhood. I think that somehow I have to instill the confidence within her that she makes good decisions and she comes to me when she has questions.
We are at a moment where we don't know the rules. How do you govern what your child looks at on the Internet? You can't. It's impossible. How many hours should they be on it? What kind of device should they have? When should they get it? If I could keep my daughter from having a cell phone until she was 16, that would be fantastic! But that's completely unrealistic. And it's insane that it's unrealistic. There's no reason that a 10-year-old should have a phone, and yet so many do. I mean, if I had had a cell phone in junior high...I was already a very distracted young man. I can't imagine what I would have done if I was online all the time. I mean, I wouldn't have survived.
On whether his "Live Reads" series gives him greater insight into his own filmmaking:
Absolutely, I mean it scares the living crap out of me, because you read these scripts and they're so good. I mean, that's the problem with taking 50 of the best scripts ever written: it's paralyzing. You're seeing the best writers on their best days, the days they were touched by God, on the days they wrote things they don't even know how they got onto the page. These same writers had bad days. It would be much better for me as a writer to go and read the worst writing of Billy Wilder and I.A.L. Diamond, but, you know, you read "The Apartment" and you wonder why he would ever bother tapping a keyboard.
But, at the same time, to sit on stage with these actors ... I can feel the electric current going from the actors through me to the audience, and then vice versa, feeling those emotions live in the moment. That's the funny thing about doing this series: no matter how famous these screenplays are — "American Beauty," "The Graduate," movies that you'd presume every human being has seen — there's always somebody in the audience who's never seen the movie, and they're experiencing the film for the first time in that moment...To see how into it they are when they're not watching a movie, they're just listening, is pretty extraordinary.
Note: This transcript reflects more of our interview with Jason Reitman than is in the audio file.