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The Friday Five

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LAist's look at this week's must-read LA sports stories from around the web.

1. LA Weekly discovers USC's secret weapon -- a lawyer.

Trojan fans take heart; UCLA Bruins fans get ready for a showdown on December 3. Odds are Long Beach attorney Carmen Trutanich will make the potential misdemeanor assault charges against linebacker Rey Maualuga go away without lifting a finger.

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2. J.A. Adande hopes Kim Ng doesn't get the Dodgers GM job.

It's the wrong job for her to make history, because soon enough she'll be history, given the McCourts' penchant for finding scapegoats when things go wrong.

3. The NFL announces it will return to Los Angeles -- some time this century.

``It's the first time we've had agreement on term sheets,'' Tagliabue said, referring to the NFL and the Coliseum. ``We're one step closer, two or three steps closer. Whether it's 2009, 2010, or 2000-whatever, our goal is to have definitive agreements on all subject matters well before our league meetings in March.''

4. Bruin Hoop Scoop manages to be impressed with UCLA's 60+ point win over mighty Cal St. Monterey.

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The Bruins won 104-41 (not a typo). And you could make a pretty good argument that it wasn’t that close. It was 57-16 at halftime. Walk-on Kelvin Kim entered the game with about four minutes left…in the first half.

5. Boi From Troy makes the case against Texas.

George Bush is from Texas, and he misled us into war…just like many are trying to mislead the Longhorns into the Rose Bowl (where people are also likely to get slaughtered, albeit metaphorically.)