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Silver Lake Bar Tour For Champions

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take a picture of this moment because it is dying fast. take a picture of sunset boulevard between hillhurst and manzanita because you will not remember it after you take the liquor shocker tour. take a shower the next morning and cry because it is over and it was beautiful and you can do it again any night of the week and you are an alcoholic.

start at the tiki ti. order any of the suspiciously named beverages that cost at least twelve dollars and realize that you are getting exactly what you're paying for. one drink will get you slammered. yes. slammered.

move on to the akbar. one of the bartenders is from seattle so obviously he knows how to freaking pour them. order a whiskey sour. take over the jukebox it has great tunes. three songs and get on to the next bar.

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a caipirinha is the only thing you order at malo taqueria. brazilians clearly know the importance of signature fucks-you-up drinks. the place is crowded but it's tolerable. at this point you are stumbling so get your butt over to 4100.

at 4100 you will order something inoffensive like a vodka soda to bide your time until some mexicans pour shots down your throat and you get really excited about the jukebox again and put in like fifteen songs and insist that everyone pay strict attention while you lip sync journey and kick your friends in the face.

now get your plastered asster to the pacific dining car and order something carb-based and go home lock yourself in the bathroom and think about what you just did.

photo by kchrist on flickr