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LAist only wishes this company memo were real. Anybody out there feel the same way?
XYZ Company Memo
To: All Employees
From: The Management
Re: Baked Goods in the Office
While we understand that the bringing in of baked goods (homemade or store-bought) to share with your co-workers is a nice gesture and improves company morale, management has heard numerous complaints of team members not following the rules for baked goods as outlined in the company handbook (Page 43, Section IV). So we’d like to offer all employees a refresher course in “baked goods etiquette”:
1. If you see someone entering the office with the following items: cake, cookies, pies, lemon squares, donuts, etc., do not ask them for a sample before he/she reaches his/her desk. Accordingly, do not follow the person with the items to his or her desk and wait for them to set up the goods in order to be the first in line. 2. It's standard protocol for an e-mail invitation to be sent to immediate team members and friends of the goods-bringer, so if you have not been included on the preliminary e-mail, then wait until all invitees have been served before you partake.
3. If you are on that first e-mail invitation, please take only one or two items for consuming on premises – we’ve heard reports of “hoarders” who take four or five cookies, and wrap them up to bring home before others have had a chance to sample in the bounty.
4. There are a few team members – and you know who you are – that have a “homing device” implanted under their skin to help them zero-in on the baked goods in the office. Common sense applies here: If you don’t know the person’s name, then maybe, before eating that lemon square, it’s about time to learn it.
