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Jackass Don Vito Has His Hands Full in Mile High

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Bam's big fat crazy-eyed uncle isn't being allowed to leave Colorado after being accused of two felonies for feeling up teenagers at a skate park.

Fifty year old Vincent ("Don Vito") Margera, the lovably obese slurring patsy for pro skater Bam Margera's lame ass east coast fraternity pranks (although the time the went medieval all over the front lawn with knights and jousting was pretty cool) was at a promotional event in Lakewood when a 12 year-old and a 14 year-old accused him of fondling them.

Yesterday the Jefferson County court said that he was not allowed to leave the state without permission, MTV reported. In a brilliant move he hired the woman who defended Kobe Bryant when he ran into his sex-based allegation in Colorado.

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Hopefully the DA doesn't Google "Don Vito" and press the Images tab or like the pic above, they will find a parade of images of boobies in his paws and face - they'll even find a short video for Playboy. Fortunately none that we could see on the Interwebs included any that appeared to be underage.

Chin(s) up, Don Vito. Go to Golden and take the tour or something.

Meanwhile, for some reason LA is holding John Mark Karr and wont send him where he belongs, with his lawyers in Colorado. Too bad the trading deadline is passed.

photo via webshots