Support for LAist comes from
We Explain L.A.
Stay Connected

Share This

This is an archival story that predates current editorial management.

This archival content was written, edited, and published prior to LAist's acquisition by its current owner, Southern California Public Radio ("SCPR"). Content, such as language choice and subject matter, in archival articles therefore may not align with SCPR's current editorial standards. To learn more about those standards and why we make this distinction, please click here.


Mysterious Package Seen on Defamer EXPOSED

Before you
Dear reader, we're asking you to help us keep local news available for all. Your financial support keeps our stories free to read, instead of hidden behind paywalls. We believe when reliable local reporting is widely available, the entire community benefits. Thank you for investing in your neighborhood.

When it comes to crotch identification, no one works harder than LAist.

Last week one of our favorite LA blogs, Defamer, ran the underwear photo above (and to the right), accompanied with a story about a movie and blah blah blah. But the mystery remained: Who's Crotch is That?"

Happily, our tireless hours of up-close interviews and in-your-face journalism have not been for naught. Thanks to an amazingly reliable source close to the project, we have solved the mystery of this unmarked package.

Support for LAist comes from

Turns out that last week’s script-delivering, banana smuggling bandit was none other than LA native Branden Williams, boyfriend of Amy Smart, and Homeboy #1 from Can’t Hardly Wait. Apparently, this chore was a labor of love as rumor has it the man has an apparent obsession with male strippers. And also, the tattoo is real. Go you.

The nearly naked stunt was a deft, attention getting maneuver aimed to garner studio partnership for the hopeful Untitled Male Stripper Comedy (with Chris Pontius of Jackass fame already attached to the project).

As the story goes, Branden The Bold walked into the studios fully dressed, hand delivered the script to the designated decision maker, and once it was signed for, he tossed it on the desk and promptly (and sexily) took off his clothes in a lavish, gyrating display of manitude.

Give these guys a green light. They work hard for the money.