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Arts and Entertainment

Advice Columnist Gets Pranked With Plot Of 'The Room'

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Even though we think The Room is a straight-up masterpiece, as in one of the greatest worst movies ever made, we can't imagine that everyone has had the opportunity to watch it. One unsuspecting advice columnist was trolled pretty hard when a reader asked for some advice for problems that bore an uncanny similarity to the plot of The Room.

Amy Dickinson, who helms the Detroit Free Press' "Ask Amy" column, gave some heartfelt advice over the weekend to a reader who signed off as "Devastated" (Oh, hi Devastated!). The reader's letter came off earnest, and only hardcore fans of filmmaker Tommy Wiseau's work would know that many phrases, especially in the last paragraph of the letter, were lines from the film.

Here's Devastated's letter:

Dear Amy: I have a serious problem with my future wife. She has not been faithful to me. I recently overheard her talking to her friend about how she was unfaithful to me. When I confronted her, all that she said was that she couldn't talk right now. I feel like I have to record everything in my own house just to learn the truth.

To make things even more stressful is the fact that she recently told a couple of people that I hit her, but it's not true. I did not hit her. I'm not sure why she has been acting like this lately. She did just find out that her mother has breast cancer, and that might be playing a role in her behavior.

We still always find time to make love, so I don't know why she would go out seeking it from someone else. I just can't believe she would do this to me. I love her so much, she is my everything, and I don't know that I could go on without her. She is tearing me apart.

What should I do? — Devastated

Those last few lines of the letter come from possibly the best scene from
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The Room when Wiseau's character, Johnny, yells out, "You're tearing me apart, Lisa":

We assume Dickinson hasn't seen the movie, because this was her response:

Dear Devastated: The first thing you should do is to NOT get married. Your fiancée's behavior and your response are the very essence of dysfunction. If you are correct and she is stepping out on you, this is a huge problem. Your declaration that you feel like you "have to record everything … just to learn the truth" is chilling. Her counter-accusation that you hit her is potentially very dangerous for you. Because of an escalation in behavior I sense in both of you — and the seemingly toxic connection between you two — it would be wisest for you to separate. Seek the support of close friends, family, and a professional counselor to help you deal with this loss and change.

This would have been sage advice for Johnny, and if he had taken it, things wouldn't have escalated so quickly. But in the words of Johnny, "You know what they say—love is blind."

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