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Arts and Entertainment

Lucha VaVOOM @ The Mayan, 2/12/08

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Walking away from the Mayan Theater on Tuesday night, dazed, my ears still ringing and images of brightly-colored wrestling unitards still flashing before my eyes, I was transported back through time and space to a little strip club in Montana called Shotgun Willie’s, on a hot night last August.

I was sitting on the stage, handcuffed to the pole by a naked young blonde woman for what's called a "hostage dance." Out of the blue she began batting me in the face with her large, perfect, pendulous breasts. The sensation was so overwhelming I wasn’t sure what to feel. They were amazingly soft and bouncy, yet a little cool and damp. It was so much of a good thing in such an unexpected way, and so fast and furious, that it was impossible for me to digest on the spot.

That was the only thing that I have ever experienced that came close to Lucha VaVOOM.