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College Football Week 2 Recap: Is That All There Is?

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Two weeks into the college football season, and I’m disappointed.

A lot of the top-ranked teams just haven’t been as dominating as I thought. USC’s win over Idaho last week left a bad taste in my mouth. California struggled this week against Colorado State. And where in the world was Louisville’s defense? And Wisconsin just squeaking by UNLV?

But in the face of these underwhelming performances, there were a couple that really impressed me.

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#2 LSU over #9 Virginia Tech 48-7. Now that was a football clinic. Everyone expected this to be a low-scoring game featuring two of the best defenses in the country. Who would have known that LSU actually has an offense? QB Matt Flynn did whatever he wanted against the Hokie defense.

But the Hokies looked plain awful. Mind you they didn’t look that hot against East Carolina, but I didn’t think they would lay a complete egg against the Tigers. If I were the Hokies, I would call up Michael Vick. I think he has one more year left in eligibility.

#5 Oklahoma over Miami (FL) 51-13. I realized yesterday that I left the Sooners out of my rankings. Oops. I really thought this would be a close game. Proves what I know. Oklahoma took the Hurricanes on their collective knees and whooped them to next week.

I actually had a guy over during the game. I left the game on in my living room while we went into my boudoir for some really awful sex. While bobbing up and down on his smegma-encrusted cock, all I could here was, “Bradford sets to pass, Kelly catches it, TOUCHDOWN SOONERS!” Thankfully by the fourth quarter the guy was gone.