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Alternative Health: LAist's Most Questionable Practices

Photo by JaseMan/Flickr
We've all done some crazy things in the name of health, a better bod or a spiritual cleanse. Today, LAist's writers and editors confess our most questionable decisions; some successful, some not so much. Some downright dangerous. But we do it for you, readers, so read on...
"I went macrobiotic to be in synch with someone I was dating. The astringency of the diet turned me into a total beeyotch."
"After running a 5K race, I was so tight that I couldn't touch my toes anymore. I went to Whole Foods for lunch and saw a guy giving chair massages to people in the health section of the store. I decided to go for a 20 minute massage to see if that would help. This guy had magical hands--20 minutes later, I could touch my toes."
"Did 30 days of a Isagenix cleanse. Actually, it works if you are trying to lose weight. In 30 days, went down a few holes on the belt. But in reality, it's an expensive way to do calorie reduction. You can do it on your own on the cheap, but since you pay a lot of money, you make sure you follow through. Isagenix is also one of those legal pyramid like schemes."
"What haven't I tried, honestly? The enema series was probably the weirdest (and yet I've never had better health then the weeks afterwards - clear and radiant skin, holla!), but the high levels of guaifenesin for this alternative Fibromyalgia treatment felt the most suspect while having no noticeable effect. Right now I'm on gluten-free and vegan (and no caffeine) and it's the first year in memory that I've eluded the common cold. (Knock. On. Wood.)"
"I gave up gluten 5 months ago, immediately felt more alert and alive, and since then have lost more than 15 pounds I wanted to lose."
"Quit social veterinary tranquilizer use."
"In high school I read Survival into the 21st Century by Viktoras Kulvinskas. It gradually took you through vegetarianism, what we now cal veganism, and fruitarianism. I eventually became a fruitarian, because that was the only thing that did not harm the earth. You were "freeing the seed" to grow MORE life (unlike vegetables, which you are killing).
I became anemic. I opened up the next chapter and it was called Breatharianism. Apparently many people in the mountains live happily to a ripe old age harnessing the energy of water and the sun. It taught you to PHOTOSYNTHESIZE. I threw the book away and bought a cheeseburger."
"I was really influenced by the book "French Women Don't Get Fat". She had so much practical advice about how to eat heathy local food in moderation and how to enjoy life."
"Too much meat is bad for the body. Eat good cuts of meat in small amounts, thinking of it as a garnish to fruit vegetable, and grains is the best. I have been trying to follow that advice."
"I had a wart on the heel of my foot a few years ago. It was very stubborn and wouldn't go away even with Compound W as well as some home remedies. I had read on the internets about people using duct tape to remove warts, so I taped up the the area in question and about a week later, I could see that it was getting to the point of almost coming off. My wife got me some other topical anti-wart medicine right around that time and the combination of the tape and stick got rid of it about 2 days later.
The only unfortunate part was that I have very sensitive skin. Thus, the adhesive from the tape and trapping of moisture it caused was starting to give me a rash on my foot. Fortunately that didn't bother me too much and went away within a day or two after the wart went away and I had stopped using the tape."
"Last year I tried colonics and was talked into doing five within 10 days because the clinic told me I needed that many treatments to restore my colon to health. The whole time I was really sick with a deep cough, they told me it was the toxins being released. I really was hoping this would all work for me and that I'd have a life-changing experience, but in the end I'm not sure if I buy it. My skin didn't get amazingly clear, I didn't lose weight or any inches around the middle, I didn't have more energy and I wasn't even all that regular. I've talked to some doctors since and they've told me different things. It was nice to see all that stuff come out of you, but man, that shit is expensive (no pun intended)."
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