Results tagged “Ross A. Lincoln”

Confidential To The Porn Industry: HIV Is Not Erotic

It's been a crazy week (and then some) for California's other film industry, as they've experienced yet another HIV outbreak among adult film actors. As is usual for this sort of thing, the latest death sentence inflicted on multiple porn actors has led to a quarantine of potentially affected people, calls for shoot cancellations, and now a reinvigorated campaign to mandate condom usage for adult film actors. Yet, stunningly, it's not intermittent quarantines and interrupted shoots, but the call to mandate safe sex practices, that has the porn industry pitching the biggest hissy fit of all.

DC Comics Bravely Reinvents Wonder Woman As A Fantasy Pin up For Middle Aged Men

I get it. Wonder Woman's original costume kind of sucks. "But", you might argue, "she's an immortal goddess. Can't she wear whatever she wants?" Sure, but come on, Superman is invulnerable to everything but kryptonite and he wears Long-Johns and a cape. For the last 70 years Wonder Woman has been saddled with a skimpy nightie that only provides zero non-magical protection (and was painfully old fashioned almost the second the ink dried), and...

Reflections on E3 and the State of Gaming: PART ONE

Those of you who didn't get to attend E3 - that's, well, most of you - Sorry for the lack of posts. That ends now. First, yes, E3 is awesome, though it's not what I expected. My previous experience with a massive trade convention is ComiCon, which is open to industry and fans alike. Indeed, the fact that fans are allowed means that in addition to being a major showcase for new gadgets, toys,...

E3ist: Images Of Note From Nerd Prom

There are things that you think about, again and again, about how awesome it will be when you finally get to do it. Sex is the obvious one. Scooters also, too. Maybe traveling somewhere awesome. But unlike skipping school to watch Star Trek 6: The Undiscovered Country, they turn out to not only live up to your expectations but to exceed them in every possible way. E3 is exactly like that only better because you...

Project Natal: First (Drunken) Impressions

Xbox 360 and Playstation 3 have between them a ton of ginormously successful, and completely awesome games. Despite this, it's no secret that Wii has completely kicked their nearly-combined asses (67 million Wii consoles sold worldwide, compared to 39 million 360s and 33 million PS3s) - for 5 years running, neither have ever been able to best their Magical Plumber Overlords. Of course, that hasn't stopped them from feverishly trying to devise a means...

LAist REVIEW: God Of War III

If you don't already know, The God of War series is a collection of action-adventure games set against the thrilling, non copyrighted landscape of Greek mythology. The protagonist, aggressively unlikable Spartan warrior Kratos, (Nicknamed "Ghost of Sparta" due to his ghastly pale complexion and Laconian area code,) wages a never ending quest for revenge against the Olympian gods, assisted in his quest only by his prickly disposition, his ability to accumulate increasingly awesome mythological...

LAist On Location: Noise Pop Fest 2010 Day Five (Part 1)

Yes, that's part ONE, because for the final segment of our thrilling account of Noise Pop Fest 2010, we've not one, but two exciting adventures to share with you, o dear readers. Saturday, February 27th found us first at Pop n' Shop, a Noise Pop sponsored boutique seller and craft fair, similar in spirit, if not in scope, to our own twice-yearly Unique La. Held at the very old school Verdi Club, SF based artists,...

LAist On Location: Noise Pop Fest 2010 Day Four

Due to technical issues... namely a digital camera running out of battery power, a mad dash to get a cheap disposable camera, and the length of time it's taking to get the film developed, the exciting account of day 3 has been preempted. We now bring you to our coverage of Noise Pop Fest day 4, already in progress... Our 4th day at Noise Pop Fest was 99% "yay!" and 50% "aw nuts!" Our plan...

LAist On Location: Noise Pop Fest 2010 Day Two

A day late and several dollars short, we are nonetheless thrilled to bring you our exciting account of day two at Noise Pop Fest in lovely San Francisco. And how was it? We're looking for a word that combines "mildly interested" with "nepotism". The festival remains fantastic, overall, but on day two (that's Wednesday, Feb. 24, for those of you paying attention) we chose our shows somewhat unwisely and saw not 1, but two children...

LAist On Location: Noise Pop Fest 2010 Day One

The annual Noise Pop Fest is San Francisco's largely successful and mostly fantastic attempt to pull off something that feels, if not identical, then vaguely similar (in a very excellent way) to Austin's overcrowded (and, arguably creatively moribund) SXSW. Starting out in 1993 as a strictly music festival, it's grown to include film and other arts, and now spans multiple venues' worth of booze soaked musical and artistic merriment. Unlike SXSW, Noise Pop remains relatively...

(In Defense of) The Loathe That Dare Not Speak Its Name

It's easy to indulge in casual stereotyping, and to accuse the opponents of gay marriage of "bigotry," "homophobia," "a stunning lack of historical knowledge" or "total failure to show basic decency." You might even point out that their arguments against the legality of gay marriage "don't make any fucking sense." But friends, that kind of rhetoric is just the same old hatred rearing its ugly head, hatred which America's political left must finally admit to, and confront.

Random Thoughts on Exciting Changes To The Social Contract!

A close friend and I have an ongoing game we call "I can't believe it's not a parody". The objective is to find songs that are 100% serious and have not been created by a comedian, and yet are impossible to believe to not be kidding. Once upon a time this was quite the difficult game, but in recent years, it has become so easy that it's almost beginning to feel like time to changes...

The Terrifying Threat Of Derivative Homosexuals

We are, after all, a nation of prudish, preening moralists who bemoan our decay but simply cannot disguise the tenting in our pants at the thought of killing wayward a-rabs, of violent, homoerotic gay bashing, of militaristic imperialist fantasies, of obscene gore, and most of all, of hypersexualizing women while demanding their purity.

LAist Review: Annie - Don't Stop

Norway's dance club mastermind Annie emerged on the music scene in 1999, with a Madonna-sampling bit of pop brilliance called "Greatest Hit" that created considerable underground buzz, which she capitalized on by spending... the next 5 years... recording her debut album. Despite the ominous overtones that usually accompany such obsessive tinkering, that record, Anniemal, was brilliant from start to finish, chock full of songs spanning various dance styles that felt shockingly new and warmly...

LAist Review: DJ Hero (With Additional 'Hilarious' Commentary On The LA Launch Event)

Last Thursday night, an improbable collection of DJs, Douchebags and Dorks gathered in a posh Downtown penthouse for a sneak preview of DJ Hero, the latest entry in Activision's increasingly ginormous Guitar Hero video game series. The appetizers were exquisite, the ambiance (provided by actual, non video game playing DJs) was redonkulous, and DJ Hero, a game which finally does for knob twiddlers and air-scratch nerds what the main Guitar Hero series did for vicarious cock-rockers, was, well, pretty damn good in the same way that the Dead Sea is kind of brackish and Sir Paul McCartney has a couple of extra dollars lying around.

The Half-Hearted, Not For The Faint Of Heart

"Being in a band right now just makes sense". So says Nathan Buckley, co-founder of Downtown's-by-way-of-Echo Park The Half-Hearted. Maybe it's the economy, the last eight years, or the fact that the Nobel Peace Prize is apparently less difficult to recieve than student of the month, but we're inclined to agree - it's either that or take up painting.

LAist Interview: Max Buschman of Equality Network

The successful passage of Prop 8 took those of us who aren't bigots by surprise in the same way Barry Keenan took Frank Sinatra Jr. at gunpoint. Having assumed that California was different from the Medievalists running the American South, the codification of anti-gay hatred was a stroke-inducing reminder that the State most associated with GLBTQ rights is also the State that inflicted Richard Nixon, Ronald Reagan and Howard Jarvis on the World. Obviously,...

Great News For (Famous) People Who Rape Children!

Roman Polanski Drugged And Raped A 13 Year Old Girl. My apologies if saying this in plain terms offends the delicate feelings of those of you who apparently believe that his career of mostly mediocre films makes him some kind of irreplaceable genius. My further apologies if, by using the accurate terminology to describe what happened, I have caused anyone to run for the fainting couch. I hope you understand how deeply and sincerely sorry I am for my rudeness. By way of apology, let me just say that Roman Polanski drugged and raped a 13 year old girl, and anyone arguing that he should not see justice, that justice has already been served, that somehow this wasn't a big deal, or that he has already paid some kind of karmic debt, is a creepy rape apologist who ought to be ashamed.

John McKinney, Director of Hector Quince: Author

"Hector thinks of himself as a mix of Henry Miller, Ernest Hemingway and Hunter S. Thompson." So says co-writer and director John McKinney of Hector Quince, the titular character of his short film Hector Quince: Author, premiering tonight at Cinespace. In it, Hector, having just completed his first successful novel and contemplating his next move, inadvertently ends up in the middle of some seriously dangerous happenstance that might just be his own fault. McKinney...

Are Backstabbing Wounds Covered By Your HMO?

UPDATE: Chris Bowers at Open Left has a much more detailed breakdown of the Baucus plan. It's far, far worse than implied yesterday. And if you care about this sort of thing, it also looks like Max let an insurance industry shill write the whole thing, and made sure that those overtly part of the insurance sector read the bill before the White House. ** ************* Tomorrow, President Obama is set to give a...

La Roux, July 27th @ The Troubadour

For the uninitiated, La Roux are the current (and richly deserving) darlings of England's resurgent synth-pop scene. After emerging last Fall as though they sprang fully formed from the head of drum machine Zeus, the London-based duo (singer/keyboardist Elly Jackson and keyboardist co-writer Ben Langmaid) has gone from "who?", to "Holyfuckingshit" in less time than it took the Bush Administration to hoax the Democratic caucus into accepting their transparently idiotic WMD claims. Their first single, "Quicksand", recorded before they even had a proper record deal, debuted in December and quickly became an international iPod staple. In short order, they subsequently:

CD Review - Blaine Campbell's The Secret Snowstorm

Blaine Campbell is a man on a mission - most of the time. For the last few years, when he hasn't been entertaining friends with his home-taped Christmas records and intermittent LA area live shows, he's been involved in politics (including working with former Mayor Hahn, and having been a 2004 delegate to the Democratic National Convention!). For now, politics has taken a backseat to art and finally, seemingly years in the making, Blaine's...

Jens Lekman (W/ Tig Notaro) @ The Echo, 05/28/09

"So what's with the Prop 8 bullshit anyway?" So said Jens Lekmen just before starting "A Postcard to Nina", to warm applause from the crowd of Angelenos who were as weary of codified hatred as they were entranced by the performer in front of them. The comment was a grim reminder of the things America (and in particular, California), sorely lacks: decency; equal protection under the law; and more musicians like Jens Lekmen....

Assume The Position 3, Tonight and Tomorrow @ The El Portal Theater

The El Portal in NoHo Comedian Robert Wuhl is probably better known for his film roles or for his HBO series Arli$$, than he is for his stand up, though he's been at it for the bulk of his 30+ career. This changed somewhat in 2006 with the launch of Wuhl's brilliant Assume The Position with Mr. Wuhl, a hilarious history lecture (given to actual students) about the way history is created and treated...

Sebastien Tellier with Chairlift @ The Independent, 04/17/09

Despite representing France at Eurovision 20081, having songs featured on TV shows as widely watched as Ugly Betty and playing to sold out crowds nationwide, Sebastien Tellier is, in the United States, surprisingly obscure. The question "who?"2 must have been asked about 40 times in the weeks prior to the show, and we eventually gave up putting him into broader context; instead, we simply said "imagine if Giorgio Moroder and Prince were surgically grafted to...

The End Of Prohibition And State's Rights

For people opposed to our current national Policy regarding marijuana, it has been an interesting couple of months. Secretary of State Clinton’s “shocking” admission that the problems stemming from the drug trade are in large part because Americans Like Drugs is the most recent, but most startling was newly minted US Attorney General Eric Holder articulation of the Obama administration's position on medicinal marijuana: Tepidly hands-off. They will no longer raid or prosecute Medical...

LAist Review - Princeton's Bloomsbury EP

Last October, LAist had the opportunity to interview local band Princeton as they were beginning the push to support their debut recording, the Bloomsbury EP. The interview was great but we've been remiss in getting to a review of the actual record. Fortunately, they're playing tonight at Spaceland's Club NME, which provides the perfect excuse to make up for this egregious error. The EP, named after the district in central London that is almost...

Wednesday Eve Video Tomfoolery - God's House by Honor Student

God's House: Phone Book - watch more funny videos Fearing the lack of God in your life? In need of some salvation, stat? Longtime friends of LAist, Los Angeles' own Honor Student are back with another short. Welcome to God's House....

Eightmaps.com: Hypocritical Privacy Violation, Or Reverse-Super Judo?

For people concerned that the Obama era would be a time of reconciliation and national good feeling, during which old and painful divisions would be healed and the impetus for political-tourrette's outbursts would be gravely diminished, Proposition 8 has been the gift that keeps on giving. Since passing last November, the battle between the supporters of equal rights and the supporters of building a magic time machine back to the 19th century has been...

An Immodest Proposal

In the latest of an increasingly dismal series of articles about the terrifying state of California's Economy, the lede says it all: California, the eighth largest economy in the world, is broke. Wait, what? Since state legislators failed to meet an end of January deadline on an agreement to make up for California's $40 billion budget gap, residents won't be getting their state tax rebates, scholarships to Cal Grant college will go unpaid, vendors...

The Year Of Livingly Tediously - The 10 Worst Things About 2008

It's no secret that 2008 has been a massive, epic failure of a year. With a couple of glaring exceptions, practically everything that could possible have gone wrong has gone miserably and completely wrong. It's almost as if the last 8 years was nothing more than a time release poison pill set to take effect at approximately... um, what time is it right now? You name it and it probably sucked - why, so much...

You got Goop All Over My Plebes!

For those of you too busy standing in line for unemployment checks to snark at celebs online, former LA resident and occasional actress Gwyneth Paltrow is now the full time proprietor of GOOP, the most unintentionally hilarious guide to better living since the 1970s edition of the Joy of Sex1. Each week, Gwyneth sends out a GOOP newsletter with helpful suggestions on how to live the good life. Clearly they're culled from a time capsule...

Photo Essay: Thousands In Downtown Protest Prop H8

UPDATE BELOW THE JUMP. Braving unseasonably (and unbearably) hot summer-like weather*, thousands of equality supporting Angelenos gathered this morning in Downtown to protest the nefarious assault on the civil rights of gay Americans, the much reviled Proposition 8. It was a fitting end to a week that's seen a tremendous (albeit much too late) backlash against the measure - Protests at Mormon temples, a boycott of a longstanding staple of West Hollywood dining - even...

LAist Review: Earth Sucks

No insult instended, but it would be tremendously foolish not to see Eath Sucks. Think about Earth Girls Are Easy, by way of Little Shop of Horrors, combined with Phantom of the Paradise. If you can kind of conjure up what that might be like, you're halfway to getting a sense of Earth Sucks, an hilarious* (and kinda brilliant) take on the history of Rock N Roll, America during the Bush era, and the...

Politics in California Begin to Make Sense As Support For Prop 8 Plummets

Good news for Californians opposed to enshrining bigotry into our constitution - a recent statewide poll published by the Public Policy Institute of California shows that support for the Prop 8, has declined significantly. According to their results, "Proposition 8, a constitutional amendment to ban same-sex marriage, is losing (52% to 44%) among likely voters." This comes as a huge relief after a month of hearing that California was dangerously teetering back into Dixie style...

Midnight Movie: Now This Is What Effective Political Humor Looks Like!

I'm trying not to get too excited about this thing - I bear deep emotional scars* from '04 and '00 (not to mention '98 and '94). And if you recall, our team also had the superior online mockery back in 04. But damned if the sheer volume of really effective Making-McCain-look-ridiculous mockery isn't making me hopeful. Also, attention SNL: This guy is way funnier than the douche you have impersonating Obama right now. Hire...

The Worst Idea In History

No, We're not talking about the proposed 700 Billion Dollar giveaway/complete abbrogation of checks and balances that Henry Paulson is trying to mad-dog out of congress this week*. We're referring to the latest diseased rumblings from the filth merchants who call themselves Studio Executives. In this case, much like a frat boy found date-raping someone, who then reacts to the horrified shrieks by asking "want a piece?", Universal has announced that some hackneyed reprobates...

Vampire Weekend at the Wiltern, 09/18/08

I'll be honest with you - Prior to seeing them live, I couldn't muster up enough emotion to form an opinion about Vampire Weekend. I didn't have anything against them, but they were firmly in the won't-turn-it-off-if-it-comes-on-the-radio/wouldn't-make-fun-if-they-were-on-a-friend's-iPod category - likable, definitely; terrible, definitely not, but I found them unremarkable, inoffensive and competently un-mind blowing. After seeing them perform at the Wiltern last thursday, I can report that my opinion was somewhat misguided. No, I...

Sarah Palin, The Right To Choose, And The Rotten State Of American Politics

In a stunning twist of logic that has breathed new life into the once moribund TV series John McCain For President, Republican Presidential Candidate and POW-Tourrette's sufferer John McCain has selected Alaska Republican Governor Sarah Palin to be his Vice Presidential running mate. During weeks of intense media speculation that can only be described as "compulsory", "not as relevant as the interest in Obama's decision", or "barely interesting", McCain played coy, leading on a number...

CA Supreme Court To Bigots: Yes, You Have To Actually Do Your Jobs

The California Supreme Court has continued its longstanding track record of providing inexhaustible fodder for the right wing chain e-mail we all get from our conservative relatives, today handing down a verdict that, in fact, doctors cannot deny heath care simply because an invisible Sky God says so: California's high court on Monday barred doctors from withholding medical care to gays and lesbians based on religious beliefs, ruling that state law prohibiting sexual orientation discrimination...

Governator to State Employees: U R PWNED NOOBZ

As reported by our good friends, the Stuggling LA Times, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger*, has weighed the options and determined that when it comes to negotiating a new budget, the most effective tactic? Human Shields: Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger has prepared an order to cut the pay of about 200,000 state workers to the federal minimum wage of $6.55 an hour until a budget is signed. Administration officials said Schwarzenegger was expected to sign the order, a...

Opinionist: Good Job, LA Times - You're Almost As Good As The Enquirer

UPDATE: Further down the page, I refer to Jonah as an idiot. That's not really fair, and I apologize. He's a fu an incredible idiot: One small point in response (I know, I know: Why bother?). The 13th amendment lists involuntary servitude and slavery as different things. If they were the same, the founders wouldn't have wasted the ink repeating themselves. In case you're curious, here's a brief description of just how much of an...

For Those About To Pretend To Rock - US Air Guitar Championships (LA Regionals)!

We at LAist are sad to report that there is no longer any point to making art, recording music or even writing something in that Live Journal we all know you have (even if you've set it to "private" so no one knows how much you really hate that one friend of yours.) Everything our civilization could possibly contribute to the universe has been effectively and entirely topped by 20 contestants - three surly, drunken...

LAist at the movies - Mongol

Usually, the historical portrait of a famous warrior is either base hagiography or black legend, designed to vilify or venerate without really minding too much about what actually happened, as long as the subjects know that god/the gods/Lenin/George Washington specifically approves of and fully endorses the regime, or condemns it as the hated enemy. Not so with Genghis Kahn, a brutal conqueror who really was just about as incredible as you've heard. We're talking about...

LAist at the Polls: Vote NO on Proposition 98

Though it's not as high profile as the magical adventures we had on Super Tuesday, there's an election tomorrow and it's of critical importance for everyone in the State who isn't a landlord or a massive corporate entity. In addition to various local elections, there are two propositions on the ballot tomorrow competing for your vote on seemingly the same issue - Prop 98 and Prop 99. Both propositions aim to amend Eminent Domain law...

To Protect And Swerve: Highland Park Manhunt Leads Squad Car to Telephone Pole

Combining the thrill of the crime scene with the the dry humor of a better than average sitcom, an LAPD sqaud car collided, in full view of local residents, with a telephone pole on the 300 Block of Ave 57 in Highland Park, while in pursuit of a suspect. According to officers and witnesses on the scene, the suspect was believed to have brandished a handgun, fled on foot, ditched his weapon, and escaped into...

Euro-Trash/Carrion Feeder Hybrids Created Using The DNA of Short Sighted Americans

The ongoing economic meltdown (caused by the uniquely American combination of self absorbed consumption and delusional self destruction, otherwise known as the "housing boom") has become so convoluted and terrifying that it's starting to feel like science fiction. However, as the LA Times' indispensible LA Land blog makes clear, to make the most sense out of things, we should be boning up on Jonathan Swift, not Heinlein. That's because even as California's housing economy...

LAist Movie Review: Tarsem's The Fall

There are things that should have turned out, you know, good, but unfortunately didn't. It's an extremely long list. George Lucas should have been banned from going within 50 yards of a word processor when it came time to write The Phantom Menace. Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip should have been more than a terrible romantic comedy (minus, inexplicably, the comedy.) And The Fall should have been a great film. I honestly, really wanted...

Irksome and Insufferable: The Ten Most Annoying Singers

Last week, the attention of LAist's family of contributors was directed to Yahoo Music blog List of the Day, and an entry called The Ten Most Annoying Singers. Now normally, we love lists like this. Not only do we get to vent our seething jealousy of the success of idiots, but much needed schadenfreude washes over us like an embittered baptism. Now, no disrespect to Rob O'Connor (who frankly has a job we'd love), but...

Photo Gallery: The 29th District Delegate Caucus, or "Oh! The Humidity!"

There's a primary afoot and, if reports from all over the country can be believed, voter turnout in every state has consistently exceeded expecations. That ought to come as no surprise, considering that we're still talking about it, instead of fending off the latest iteration of Swift boating. Ordinarily, by this point in the game the remaining primaries would be mere formalities, Kabuki performances held mainly to support the pretense that the people who bother...

State Of California To Add Insult, Injury To List Of Unemployment Benefits

Are you a recent victim of the Bush recession? Hoping to finally cash in on those (extremely meager) unemployment benefits you've been accumulating? Better hope your cell phone bill is paid up: In January, with the unemployment rate nearing 6%, nearly 12.6 million calls were placed to the state's toll-free phone number to apply for unemployment insurance benefits. But more than three-fifths never got through. Frank Hartzell knows the problem all too well. A laid-off...

Strictly For My L.I.B.E.L.E.R.Z.

As noted earlier in a brief, the LA Times, having eaten more crow than a Lance Armstrong-Eric Clapton Constructicon, have fully retracted their most recent annual Tupac Article. Among other things, the March 17 article and related Times publications reported that newly discovered information supported Shakur's claims that associates of music executive Sean "Diddy" Combs orchestrated an attack in which Shakur was injured at the Quad Recording Studios in New York on Nov. 30, 1994....

8 Out Of 11 Judges Agree: Roommates.com Is A Very Discriminating Service. Maybe Too Discriminating...

In a decision that could have massive repercussions for Internet businesses who thrive by overcharging people for something they'll have better luck with on Craig's List, the 9th US Circuit Court has ruled that certain federal laws, specifically fair housing laws, do indeed apply to the internets: The 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals decided Thursday that a website may be found liable for violating fair housing laws by matching roommates according to gender, sexual...

You Still Have 2.5 Hours To Become a Minor Political Functionary!

Thanks to the most exciting primary season in years, there's been an understandable lot of talking about the process of selecting a presidential candidate, especially regarding Delegates, Super Delegates, and of course, Mutant Delegates from the sewars. Unfortunately, there's been a kind of New Star Wars Trilogy feel to reporting on the matter; ponderous, boring, pretentious and narratively inconsistent, but somehow taking forever to get through. The general consensus seems to be that these Ancient,...

Pennies From Heaven? No, just Corporate Welfare

New News for those following the ongoing Countrywide trainwreck. As reported by the LA times on Saturday, despite the ongoing national economic worries, and the total meltdown of the company, Countrywide Executives are still set to recieve Big Bucks Big Bucks no Whammies: The top two executives of beleaguered Countrywide Financial Corp. will pocket $19 million in stock next week, according to a regulatory filing. It's the start of a series of multimillion-dollar payments expected...

Online Metaphor Saves Last Remaining Dead Horse Molecules, Humiliates Gullible Local Paper

On March 17th, the LA Times published yet another article in its ongoing struggle to squeeze every last drop of blood out of the stone that once called itself Tupac Shakur. After an "in-depth" investigation into the Nov. 30, 1994 shooting/pistol whipping of Tupac, Times reporter Chuck Philips alleged, among other things, that Rap Mogul Sean "Puffy/Puff Daddy/P Diddy/Vanity Smurf" Combs might have had advance knowledge of the attempt on Shakur's life. Puffy* was not...

The Photoshop Around The Corner

Most people are probably aware of how difficult a thing it is to satirize something large. One runs the risk of either cutting so broadly as to make the observation meaningless, or being so specific that only those being described will even get the joke. Which is to say, it's a fine line. Not as fine as "Was your father a thief? Because I'd really like to have sex with you." But nearly so....

A Sneak Preview of the High-Minded 'Journalism' We Can Look Forward To This Fall!

For months, critics of Hillary Clinton, from John "such a mavericky maverick that he promises his presidency will be exactly like George Bush's" McCain, to our corporate liberal media, have been demanding, with different degrees of credulity, that Hillary release her White House records. From newsrooms to blog comments, it's been a tidal wave of"What is She hiding?!", or "Why doesn't she follow Obama's lead and release her records?" And who can blame them? With...

If You Act Now, You'll Get Full Mayoral Services Absolutely FREE!!

Via LA Now, The Daily News is reporting that LA won't have to buy the cow today because Mayor Villaraigosa is giving away the milk for free: Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa will take a furlough day today. Villaraigosa, who makes $223,142 a year, will give up $858.26 in gross pay as a way to encourage other city employees to take unpaid vacation days. "The buck stops with me, and I am absolutely committed to making the...

A Play About Puppets Who Do Terrible Things To Each Other

On Saturday, March 8rd I went down to Silverlake's Manual Archives (a "Microtheater") and saw a strange and wonderful play called Concrete Folk Variations Part 1: Death Of A Sugar Daddy. Written and designed by Susan Simpson, this absurdly titled play is a surprisingly gripping thriller about city corruption, sex and murder, set against the backdrop of LA's gay underground during the McCarthy era. It had literally everything - A scandal revealing the black underbelly...

The Reign of eTerror: Are Blogs Responsible For Suicide?

I'm so glad there weren't any blogs in 1999. Otherwise they'd have been blamed for Colombine. But in all seriousness, last weekend it was reported that the death of advertising mogul Paul Tilley (The alleged Brain behind The Dell Dude and "I'm Lovin' it," if you can believe that) was ruled a suicide. In the wake of the disturbing end to a career filled with ridiculous, though culturally significant ephemera, an unlikely culprit is being...

Concert Review: British Sea Power -- Never Go See Them Live

Spaceland, Thursday, Feb 28 (With a Pause to mention their Echo show on the 27th.) I really wanted to write a positive review. I walked into the Echo on Wednesday, February 27th, firmly intending to come out again 3 hours later with a gloriously sycophantic description of the show. I was planning on pure hagiography, with illuminations and everything depicting the sure-to-be brilliant performance. It came then as a depressing shock when the band utterly...

Terrible News For People Opposed To Putting Baby In Corner: Patrick Swayze Has Cancer?

UPDATE: Damn it, it's confirmed: A press release issued by the actor's spokesperson Wednesday said: "Patrick Swayze has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and is currently undergoing treatment. Patrick's physician Dr. George Fisher states The Good news? 'Patrick has a very limited amount of disease and he appears to be responding well to treatment thus far. All of the reports stating the timeframe of his prognosis and his physical side effects are absolutely untrue. We...

Interview with Stillwater, Ok's Colourmusic

Colourmusic are the rarest of musical rarities- a band from the isolated hinter portions of America's Heartland (Also known as "The Sticks") that not only doesn't suck, but actually turns out to be pretty great. And not in that sort of special olympics, everyone's a winner, "well, they're good for [insert your tiny state here]" kind of way, but actually, honestly, for realsies good. Kind of like how The Flaming Lips are so good...

WARNING: There is a 50% Chance You Will Be Carjacked By A Yuppie Sometime Tonight Between 5:30 and 8:30

Ah, another glorious, status conscious, conspicuously consuming day. I've spent such a long time typing away on my Macbook Air, and now I'm just about ready to drive home to Beechwood Canyon where I'll spend the evening watching Bravo. Hotcha! But hmmm, now that I think about it, maybe a stop at Pinkberry for some deliciously monotonous icy sludge would add to the perfection of the day. No, wait! I've got it! I'll cap things...

Igloo Tornado Show @ black maria Gallery Saturday, February 23; Also, An Interview.

Igloo Tornado is an East Side based art collective (they actually call it a Fraternity, which when you account for their frequent references to beer, can probably be taken in both the Classical Greek and Collegiate meanings) featuring the work of Levon Jihanian, Tom Neely, Gin Steven and Scot Nobles. They formed in 2004, had their first show as a group in 2006 and after a two year hiatus, they're back with an Eponymously...

Free Music and Free Pretzels in Glendale.

Love Pretzels? Love Indie Rock? Often find yourself torn between these two passions like the protagonist in some kind of terrible 80s R&B song about adultery and not wanting to be right? If that's you, then your tactile sensations love triangle is over. Tonight, Classical Geek Theatre and LA Underground are bringing together the sweet sound of indie rock and the soft salty goodness of some of LA's best Pretzels. It's at the Scene bar...

Funniest Blog In the World Alert

If you're like me, (white, liberal, living in an urban setting) you're probably a huge fan of The Neverending Story. Remember near the end of the film, when The Nothing has completely destroyed all of Fantasia, except for the Childlike Empress? Then, in the blackness of space, she turns to the screen and surprises the living hell out of Bastian, (the framing device/protagonist of the film,) by telling him that He's The One!!!, that the...

Concert Review - Moistboyz @ The Troubadour, 02/12/08

As I sat in the Troubadour balcony, looking down on Moistboyz singer Dickie Moist screaming to a crowd of roughly 70 people like a stadium full of Billy Graham disciples, something occurred to me: Rock 'n Roll used to have real power. It changed society, outraged moralists, defied suppression and even affected the way artists in other music forms approached their compositions, and this was during the 50s, when the average Rock song was either...

Moistboyz, live tonight at The Troubadour & LAist Interview

For those of you who don't know, Moistboyz are a politically vulgar Punk-Metal hybrid Featuring Lead Vocalist Dickie Moist (Guy Heller,) and Lead Guitarist Mickey Moist (AKA Mickey Melchiondo, AKA Dean Ween of Ween.) They've been playing and recording ittermittently since the early 90s, with increased activity during the 2000s. Their music somehow manages to combine methamphetamine levels of energy, and aggressively in-your-face politics that, frankly, defy all description. (It's true - I don't like...

Apparently, The Only Thing More Difficult Than Building A Subway To The Beach Is Casting A Vote

An Op-Ed follow up to this morning's news... Via The LA Times, it seems all is not well with LA's super Tuesday results: Across Los Angeles County, many nonpartisan voters who cast ballots in the Democratic primary have learned to their dismay that their votes in the presidential contest did not matter. ... {California Democratic Party spokesman} had harsh words for L.A. County's voting system. "It's a terrible ballot design," he said. "It requires the...

Indie Pop Explosion In Your Ears, Tonight @ The Scene in Glendale

If you're like me and you hate pro football, or if you're looking for something to do after Football Team A defeats Football Team B in the field of Superbowly Combat, go to The Scene in Glendale tonight, and see NYC based Indie Pop Band Murder Mystery, along with LA's The Tartans and Oxnard's Maria. So why should you brave the rain and the perils of Glendale? Well if you're like me, you're in need...

Wake Up LA: Auntie Em's Kitchen

If You don't actually live in Eagle Rock or Highland park, getting out here for a nice weekend breakfast probably feels like joining the Donner party, especially if you're hungry and your belly is screaming "NOW NOW NOW" at you as loudly as a belly can. Which it probably is. "Why should I drive all the way out there?" I can almost hear you saying as you surrender to the despotism of your appetite....

A Tremendously Efficient Way To Make Life Harder for Californians

Just in time for spring, the LA Times is reporting on something I think would just go marvelously with that recession you've been looking at: Proposal aims to undo rent control laws Before we go any further, jut let that sink in. How pleasantly banal it sounds. Like "Proposal aims to change terms of your relationship from monogamous to yerdumped," or "Proposal Aims to replace your sweet Graphic Design Job with minimum wage position at...

An Oscar Sized Nuclear Bomb Explodes In My Brain

UPDATE: Looks like the forces of Truth, Justice and the Irishican Way prevailed everyone - It's not hard in here for a Once after all: "The Academy's music branch executive committee has met and endorsed the validity of 'Falling Slowly' as a nominated achievement. The committee relied on written assurances and detailed chronologies provided by songwriter of 'Falling Slowly', the writer-director of Once and Fox Searchlight." So there you go - The good guys...

In Los Angeles, the streets are paved with Golden Parachutes

Via L.A. Land, the Associated Press is bringing us the latest chapter in the uplifting Horatio Alger story of CountryWide Financial Corp's Angelo Mozilo: ...under fire over the size of his potential payout from the proposed sale of his troubled mortgage company, [Mozilo] says he is forfeiting some $37.5 million in severance pay, fees and perks he was scheduled to receive upon his retirement. $37.5 million? Hell's Bells! Remind me to flog my 401K...

Kill Radio's "A Benefit For Us" to put the "Fun" back into "Draising!"

Photo by Ned Raggert via Flickr Those of you still looking for something to do this weekend, who also want to somehow combine this weekend-something-doing with music, leftist politics and dancing are in luck. The feisty internet agitators at Kill Radio are holding another fundraiser, this one at the Echo Curio, Saturday night (January 26 if you're nasty) at 9 PM. For a small donation (just 5 to 10 rapidly devaluing American Dollars,) you'll...

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