Where To Get Drunk And Watch The Comey Hearing At 7 A.M. On Thursday

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The Tattle Tale Room. (Photo by Joan S. via Yelp).

Back in the halcyon days before the 2016 election, TVs in bars were reserved for football reruns and infomercials on mute. Now, as the nation awaits fired FBI director James Comey's testimony before Congress on Thursday with all the depraved enthusiasm of Dallas viewers demanding to know who shot J.R., it seems necessary to round up some group-watching spots with plenty of booze and TVs that carry major news channels. Our friends at DCist report that several bars in the District have organized viewing parties around Comey's testimony, complete with "Covfefe cocktails" and drinks on the house every time Trump tweets during the hearing. Not to be outdone, we went in search of our own specials. Yes, the Comey hearing is scheduled to begin at 10 a.m. on Capitol Hill, which is 7 a.m. here in L.A., but when have Angelenos ever shied away from a little civically-minded day-drinking?

Despite our extensive research, we were unable to locate any L.A. bars with early-morning Comey specials or even specific watch-party vibes, which, like our low voter turnout, is a civic disappointment that should shame our whole city. (Know of one? Please prove us wrong with an email to tips@laist.com)

But just because no one's advertising any fall-of-the-nation early a.m. discounts doesn't mean you should have to watch sober. Here are a list of L.A.-area bars that open at or before 7 a.m. and have said they will be showing the testimony live. Grab your beers, your buds, your Comey-testimony drinking game and your pocket Constitution and settle in to watch America's already-tarnished reputation sustain yet another crippling body blow. Fun!

Lost & Found in Mar Vista "If it's on TV, it'll be on," according to Mike, who answered the phone at Lost & Found. The bar opens at 7 a.m.

Lost & Found is located at 11700 National Boulevard in Mar Vista.

Lei Aloha in Westchester "Just come in at 7 a.m. and if we get that channel, someone will put it on for you," according to the very nice woman who answered the phone. We are pretty sure they get that channel. Lei Aloha opens at 6 a.m.

Lei Aloha is located at 5622 W Manchester Avenue in Westchester.

Tattle Tale Room in Culver City "I'll be here at 6a.m. tomorrow," sighed Dawn, who answered the phone at Tattle Tale Room. Dawn assured us that she'll be around to turn on the news. Bonus—the bar has karaoke. Tattle Tale Room opens at 6 a.m.

Tattle Tale Room is located at 5401 Sepulveda Blvd in Culver City.

Cozy Inn in Culver City No one answered the phone at the Cozy Inn, which is actually the sign of a great dive bar, so that bodes well. They have plenty of TVs, so we think it's safe to presume at least one of them will be tuned to Comey time. Cozy Inn opens at 6 a.m.

Cozy Inn is located at 11155 Washington Place in Culver City.

The Scarlet Lady Saloon in Culver City The famed dive opens at 6 a.m. and the woman who answered the phone told us that there are a lot of TVs and at least one of them will likely be playing the news until noon. Granted, that's not exactly a watch-party promise, but these are difficult times and we'll take what we can get. The bar opens at 6 a.m.

The Scarlet Lady Saloon is located at 5411 Sepulveda Boulevard in Culver City.

First Cabin Bar in Arcadia "We have both Spectrum and DirectTV, so just come on in and ask," Jennifer of First Cabin told LAist. First Cabin Bar opens at 6 a.m.

First Cabin Bar is located at 46 E. Huntington Drive in Arcadia.

The Castle Sports Bar and Grill in Manhattan Beach Priscilla from The Castle assures us that this Manhattan Beach sports bar will be open bright and early tomorrow—just prepare to fend off sports fans for control of the remote. The Castle opens at 6 a.m.

The Castle Sports Bar and Grill is located at 2401 N Sepulveda Blvd in Manhattan Beach.

Sugar Suite in Granada Hills. Cheap beer and TVs are on offer at this Granada Hills neighborhood dive, where you can drown your political sorrows in $3 well drafts. Sugar Suite (which we assure you is not a strip club, despite the name) opens at 7 a.m.

Sugar Suite is located at 11858 Balboa Blvd in Granada Hills.

Stovepiper Lounge in Northridge This Northridge bar currently offers a Yelp deal that will get you a free Raspberry Kamikaze shot, which might make the Comey hearing move a bit faster for you. (Don't say we never gave you anything.) Stovepiper Lounge opens at 6 a.m.

Stovepiper Lounge is located at 19563 Parthenia St in Northridge.

Update [6:30 p.m.]: Great news, there is an actual bar in Los Angeles opening early for the testimony.

YOU HEARD IT HEAR FIRST AND CAN HEAR THE REST TOMORROW

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Tom Bergin's in Mid City The Fairfax mainstay, which typically doesn't open until 5 p.m., will be throwing its doors open way early Thursday morning. Join them from 6 a.m. to 10 a.m. for the "Testi-Comey." Russian vodka will be available.

Tom Bergin's is located at 840 S Fairfax Avenue in Mid City.