Elephant in the Sky at Hollywood & Highland | Photo by huangjiahui via Flickr Monday Scott McClellan signs What Happened: Inside the Bush White House and Washington's Culture of Deception 7pm @ Barnes & Noble, 3rd Street Promenade Phyllis Gebauer discusses and signs Hot Widow 7pm @ Vroman's Marianne Wiggins signs The Shadow Catcher 7:30pm @ Barnes & Noble, The Grove Salman Rushdie discusses The Enchantress of Florence with Carrie Fisher 7:30pm @ Writers......

Gorgeous floral spikes at the Getty | Photo by oscalito via Flickr Monday Stephanie Klein presents and signs Moose: A Memoir of Fat Camp 7pm @ Book Soup Tom Zimmerman discusses and signs Paradise Promoted 7pm @ Vroman's Paul Roberts discusses The End of Food with Lisa Brenneis & Bill Fujimoto 7pm @ Central Library Tuesday Jeffrey Lewis presents and signs Adam the King 7pm @ Book Soup Stephanie Klein discusses & signs Moose:......

We'll admit that Padma Lakshmi, host of Bravo TV's Top Chef is nice to look at, and she may have brains, too, but the model-actress-author does seem to lack a key ingredient in TV hosting: A little fire in the kitchen...salt'n'pepa in her stew...in other words -- a personality. But Salman Rushdie's ex isn't alone in this department. Blandness and the monotone delivery almost seem to be a prerequisite for female reality TV hosts.......

A Word or 34: Lots of new TV tonight, too bad that most of it is garbage. Potentially entertaining late night talk show guests include: Jane Fonda, Salman Rushdie, Antonio Banderas, Evangeline Lilly, Joe Rogan, and Steven Wright. Tonight - Wednesday - May 9, 2007 Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (IFC, 6:00 p.m.) Revel in the debauchery. Indians @ Angels (Fox Sports, 7:00 p.m.) Dodgers @ Marlins (PRIME, 7:30 p.m.) Jericho/Criminal Minds/CSI: NY......

A Word or 51: So last night it was either Klaus Kinski or American Idol - they're both abject and base pornography but Kinski won. Get home early today to check out the Winter X Games; other than some The Office reruns the CW seems to have the most new programming but that's not saying much. Tonight - Thursday - January 25th, 2007 The Caddy (TCM, 5:00 p.m.) Classic Jerry Lewis & Dean Martin......

Tonight - Wednesday "Funny Face" (TCM, 6:00 p.m.) Audrey Hepburn stars in this '57 musical comedy that features the dance sequence that the Gap has been using in their recent commercials "NHL Hockey" (PRIME, 7:00 p.m.) Predators @ Ducks "NBA Basketball" (Fox Sports, 7:30 p.m.) Hornets @ Lakers "America's Next Top Model" (the CW, 8:00 p.m.) Season finale "The King of Queens" (CBS, 8:00 p.m.) Season premiere - back to back episodes "The Biggest......

The 2005 finalists for the Literary Review Bad Sex in Fiction contest have been announced, and they include Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Salman Rushdie, and John Updike. You can read the complete list and the passages for which the offending authors were nominated here. Laist's (least) favorite follows, from Marlon Brando's godawful, posthumously published novel, Fan Tan; "Oh, Lord," he cried out. "I'm a-comin'!" She could not answer. It is the one drawback of fellatio......