UPDATE: Further down the page, I refer to Jonah as an idiot. That's not really fair, and I apologize. He's a fu an incredible idiot: One small point in response (I know, I know: Why bother?). The 13th amendment lists involuntary servitude and slavery as different things. If they were the same, the founders wouldn't have wasted the ink repeating themselves. In case you're curious, here's a brief description of just how much of an... [continue]

We at LAist are sad to report that there is no longer any point to making art, recording music or even writing something in that Live Journal we all know you have (even if you've set it to "private" so no one knows how much you really hate that one friend of yours.) Everything our civilization could possibly contribute to the universe has been effectively and entirely topped by 20 contestants - three surly, drunken... [continue]

Usually, the historical portrait of a famous warrior is either base hagiography or black legend, designed to vilify or venerate without really minding too much about what actually happened, as long as the subjects know that god/the gods/Lenin/George Washington specifically approves of and fully endorses the regime, or condemns it as the hated enemy. Not so with Genghis Kahn, a brutal conqueror who really was just about as incredible as you’ve heard. We're talking about... [continue]

Though it’s not as high profile as the magical adventures we had on Super Tuesday, there’s an election tomorrow and it’s of critical importance for everyone in the State who isn’t a landlord or a massive corporate entity. In addition to various local elections, there are two propositions on the ballot tomorrow competing for your vote on seemingly the same issue - Prop 98 and Prop 99. Both propositions aim to amend Eminent Domain law... [continue]

Combining the thrill of the crime scene with the the dry humor of a better than average sitcom, an LAPD sqaud car collided, in full view of local residents, with a telephone pole on the 300 Block of Ave 57 in Highland Park, while in pursuit of a suspect. According to officers and witnesses on the scene, the suspect was believed to have brandished a handgun, fled on foot, ditched his weapon, and escaped into... [continue]

The ongoing economic meltdown (caused by the uniquely American combination of self absorbed consumption and delusional self destruction, otherwise known as the "housing boom") has become so convoluted and terrifying that it's starting to feel like science fiction. However, as the LA Times' indispensible LA Land blog makes clear, to make the most sense out of things, we should be boning up on Jonathan Swift, not Heinlein. That's because even as California's housing economy... [continue]

There are things that should have turned out, you know, good, but unfortunately didn’t. It’s an extremely long list. George Lucas should have been banned from going within 50 yards of a word processor when it came time to write The Phantom Menace. Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip should have been more than a terrible romantic comedy (minus, inexplicably, the comedy.) And The Fall should have been a great film. I honestly, really wanted... [continue]

Last week, the attention of LAist's family of contributors was directed to Yahoo Music blog List of the Day, and an entry called The Ten Most Annoying Singers. Now normally, we love lists like this. Not only do we get to vent our seething jealousy of the success of idiots, but much needed schadenfreude washes over us like an embittered baptism. Now, no disrespect to Rob O'Connor (who frankly has a job we'd love), but... [continue]

There's a primary afoot and, if reports from all over the country can be believed, voter turnout in every state has consistently exceeded expecations. That ought to come as no surprise, considering that we're still talking about it, instead of fending off the latest iteration of Swift boating. Ordinarily, by this point in the game the remaining primaries would be mere formalities, Kabuki performances held mainly to support the pretense that the people who bother... [continue]

Are you a recent victim of the Bush recession? Hoping to finally cash in on those (extremely meager) unemployment benefits you've been accumulating? Better hope your cell phone bill is paid up: In January, with the unemployment rate nearing 6%, nearly 12.6 million calls were placed to the state's toll-free phone number to apply for unemployment insurance benefits. But more than three-fifths never got through. Frank Hartzell knows the problem all too well. A laid-off... [continue]

As noted earlier in a brief, the LA Times, having eaten more crow than a Lance Armstrong-Eric Clapton Constructicon, have fully retracted their most recent annual Tupac Article. Among other things, the March 17 article and related Times publications reported that newly discovered information supported Shakur's claims that associates of music executive Sean "Diddy" Combs orchestrated an attack in which Shakur was injured at the Quad Recording Studios in New York on Nov. 30, 1994.... [continue]

In a decision that could have massive repercussions for Internet businesses who thrive by overcharging people for something they'll have better luck with on Craig's List, the 9th US Circuit Court has ruled that certain federal laws, specifically fair housing laws, do indeed apply to the internets: The 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals decided Thursday that a website may be found liable for violating fair housing laws by matching roommates according to gender, sexual... [continue]

Thanks to the most exciting primary season in years, there's been an understandable lot of talking about the process of selecting a presidential candidate, especially regarding Delegates, Super Delegates, and of course, Mutant Delegates from the sewars. Unfortunately, there's been a kind of New Star Wars Trilogy feel to reporting on the matter; ponderous, boring, pretentious and narratively inconsistent, but somehow taking forever to get through. The general consensus seems to be that these Ancient,... [continue]

New News for those following the ongoing Countrywide trainwreck. As reported by the LA times on Saturday, despite the ongoing national economic worries, and the total meltdown of the company, Countrywide Executives are still set to recieve Big Bucks Big Bucks no Whammies: The top two executives of beleaguered Countrywide Financial Corp. will pocket $19 million in stock next week, according to a regulatory filing. It's the start of a series of multimillion-dollar payments expected... [continue]

On March 17th, the LA Times published yet another article in its ongoing struggle to squeeze every last drop of blood out of the stone that once called itself Tupac Shakur. After an "in-depth" investigation into the Nov. 30, 1994 shooting/pistol whipping of Tupac, Times reporter Chuck Philips alleged, among other things, that Rap Mogul Sean "Puffy/Puff Daddy/P Diddy/Vanity Smurf" Combs might have had advance knowledge of the attempt on Shakur's life. Puffy* was not... [continue]

Via LA Now, The Daily News is reporting that LA won't have to buy the cow today because Mayor Villaraigosa is giving away the milk for free: Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa will take a furlough day today. Villaraigosa, who makes $223,142 a year, will give up $858.26 in gross pay as a way to encourage other city employees to take unpaid vacation days. "The buck stops with me, and I am absolutely committed to making the... [continue]

For months, critics of Hillary Clinton, from John "such a mavericky maverick that he promises his presidency will be exactly like George Bush's" McCain, to our corporate liberal media, have been demanding, with different degrees of credulity, that Hillary release her White House records. From newsrooms to blog comments, it's been a tidal wave of"What is She hiding?!", or "Why doesn't she follow Obama's lead and release her records?" And who can blame them? With... [continue]

Most people are probably aware of how difficult a thing it is to satirize something large. One runs the risk of either cutting so broadly as to make the observation meaningless, or being so specific that only those being described will even get the joke. Which is to say, it's a fine line. Not as fine as "Was your father a thief? Because I'd really like to have sex with you." But nearly so.... [continue]

On Saturday, March 8rd I went down to Silverlake's Manual Archives (a "Microtheater") and saw a strange and wonderful play called Concrete Folk Variations Part 1: Death Of A Sugar Daddy. Written and designed by Susan Simpson, this absurdly titled play is a surprisingly gripping thriller about city corruption, sex and murder, set against the backdrop of LA's gay underground during the McCarthy era. It had literally everything - A scandal revealing the black underbelly... [continue]

I'm so glad there weren't any blogs in 1999. Otherwise they'd have been blamed for Colombine. But in all seriousness, last weekend it was reported that the death of advertising mogul Paul Tilley (The alleged Brain behind The Dell Dude and "I'm Lovin' it," if you can believe that) was ruled a suicide. In the wake of the disturbing end to a career filled with ridiculous, though culturally significant ephemera, an unlikely culprit is being... [continue]