Last Night on The Hills: Alpha Girl vs. Newbie #2
We took a half hour break from the Abraham Lincoln biography we're reading to catch up on The Hills. Here's what we learned.
This episode opened with Kristin and Stacie (who's still enthusiastically validating Kristin's every utterance) at a salon discussing McKaela. They chastised McKaela for being in way over her head and having no shot in hell of turning playboy Brody into a one-woman man. Ok first of all, neither of these bitches was actually getting her hair cut. Two stylists were clearly paid to simply flip and fluff the girls' hair around while they talked trash on the new girl. (Occasionally a cold curling iron was employed as a prop but the performance was not convincing.) Second of all, is it us, or was turning Brody straight not exactly what Kristin's been trying to accomplish since the season began?
So the whole gang hit up Bar 210 to celebrate Stephanie Pratt's birthday, sans Spencer and Heidi of course, since their craziness got them written off the show. Brody and Kristin were getting all lovey dovey until McKaela showed up and interrupted their snuggling with her dagger-like evil eye. As if that weren't enough to rock the boat, she brought New Girl #2 Allie with her, who apparently once broke into Brody's house. (Do we have another Pretty Wild girl on our hands?) Kristin made a huge scene about it, making sure to slip in that she was "in the bed, Sweetie," when Allie snuck into Brody's room. In the end, Brody pulled his signature self-centered douchebag move of the night and blamed the emotional distance between him and McKaela on the fact that she's friends with Allie, then left with Kristin on his arm. There's not much we like about Brody, but at least he's consistent.
Like an emotional cutter, McKaela called Brody the next morning to "talk" about what happened, despite Lo's reminder that he was a complete jerk and there's nothing to talk about. Brody, still basking in the afterglow of Kristin, hit Ignore. Buuuuurn.
Meanwhile, Audrina revealed that Justin Bobby had been texting her, and those must have been some intense sexts because she immediately realized she needed to break up with Ryan Cabrera. Back from his recent tour, Audrina met up with him and tried everything she could think of to convince him that he shouldn't want to date her. When he rebuffed her reasoning and proclaimed what they have is "special" and "right," Audrina sighed, realizing she was stuck in this relationship with a nice boy that loves her.
And in the spirit of peacemaking, Kristin agreed to meet with McKaela to discuss their general conflicts. In one fell swoop, Kristin pretty much told McKaela that if she keeps showing up, especially with Allie, there are going to be problems. Period. So..."you and your psychobitch friend should stay the eff away," basically.
But we're assuming McKaela has at least a few more episodes left in her contract, and we haven't even heard Allie's side of this break-in story yet. Until next week!