In Britney We Trust!

Despite the fact that Britney Spears seems only able to produce crappy albums and awkward shows, have very public meltdowns, eschew court dates, check in and out of rehab, vacillate about her religious affiliation, flash her nether-regions to eager photogs, and drink away her liquid assets in Starbucks Frappucinos, the truth of the matter is, the business of being Britney is extremely profitable...for everyone else in her world.

An article in next month's Portfolio magazine outlines the branches in Britney's ever-blossoming cash-cow tree, explaining that while "recent court documents suggest she's amassed a $125 million fortune and continues to rake in about $737,000 a month, or nearly $9 million a year" those figures are "chicken feed" as compared to what they're calling the "overall Britney economy."

Portfolio breaks it down starting with "The Packagers" who are Spears' "record company, promoters, licensers, and others" who pull in $30 to $40 million from the fumbling pop diva with things like tours, album sales, her perfumes, and her brief stint as a PepsiCo spokesgal. Then come "The Paparazzi" whose eager cameras nab them in the environs of $4 million per year for all those shots of Spears running red lights or her mouth off. "The Media" hauls in $75 million a year approximately with all of hits on search engines and magazine covers. And last, but certainly not least, the ex-Mr. Spears, er, um Kevin Federline, gets something close to $1 million a year when he combines what he draws "off his Britney-fueled image" and the "$35,000 a month from Britney in spousal and child-support payments."

It might not be easy being Britney Spears these days, but, boy are a whole lot of people in this town and all over the world laughing their way to the bank thanks to her.